


Rider Group Chat Misadventures

by franzfan23



Series: HSHFTNEP Inspired Stories [4]
Category: Kamen Rider - All Media Types
Genre: Asexual Characters, Cool aunt Souma Haruto, Cool uncle Hidari Shoutaro, Crack, Dad friend Tomari Shinnosuke, Everyone blames Tsukasa, Everyone hates Decade, Everyone treats Takeru and Sougo like a baby, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Focuses more on phase 2 riders, Group chat, Haruto and Tsukasa are agents of chaos, Haruto is a little shit, Holiday chapters, Humor, Innuendos by the dozen, Isamu is an angry man, Kadoya Tsukasa is the friend nobody likes, Kouta gets used as a curse word, Kouta is called fruit jesus, Lots of characters and ships, M/M, Mom friend Hojo Emu, Multi, No Rider is straight, Sento is like his namesake in bed, Sougo is mostly innocent, The boys are scared of their girls, Toku cameos, Tsukasa is the butt monkey of the kamen rider universe, Will update tags as i add more characters, amatsu gai can go die in a ditch, aruto uses lots of puns, chat fic, cursing, ideas are welcome, jealous Philip, no beta we die like a rider mook, sentai cameos, side bets, so prepare to cringe, spoilers abound!, there are bets, tsundere Tsukasa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 87
Words: 18,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23762821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/franzfan23/pseuds/franzfan23
Summary: When W, OOO, and Fourze teamed up for the first time, they started a Group Chat to keep in touch with one another.Since then, it had grown into a Group Chat that contains all Riders, with more Riders being added after every big team up.As you can expect, chaos ensues.Requests and ideas are open!
Relationships: Aikawa Hajime/Kenzaki Kazuma, Akiyama Ren/Kido Shinji, Alain/Fukami Kanon, Ankh/Hino Eiji, Banjou Ryuuga/Kiryuu Sento, Chase | Mashin Chaser/Shijima Gou, Date Akira/Gotou Shintarou, Fuwa Isamu/Hiden Aruto, Godai Yuusuke/Ichijou Kaoru, Hidari Shoutarou/Philip, Hikawa Makoto/Tsugami Shouichi, Inui Takumi/Kiba Yuuji, Kadoya Tsukasa/Kaitou Daiki, Kagami Arata/Tendou Souji, Kazuraba Kouta/Kureshima Mitsuzane/Takatsukasa Mai, Kisaragi Gentarou/Utahoshi Kengo, Myoukouin Geiz/Tokiwa Soug/Tsukuyomi, Myoukouin Geiz/Tokiwa Sougo/Tsukoyomi, Myoukouin Geiz/Tokiwa Sougo/Tsukuyomi, Narumi Akiko/Terui Ryu, Nozama Tomoko/Sakuta Ryuusei, Shijima Kiriko/Tomari Shinnosuke, Tenkuuji Takeru/Tsukimura Akari
Series: HSHFTNEP Inspired Stories [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1615639
Comments: 1052
Kudos: 194





	1. When It All Began, and When the Chaos Started

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Hidari Shoutaro's Home for Technically Non-Existent People](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16436333) by [narashikari](https://archiveofourown.org/users/narashikari/pseuds/narashikari). 



> Kari-chan gave me permission to post these up for her, and that's what I'll do!
> 
> Check out her blog for more posts!
> 
> All posts are the chats now written in text form and proofread for better enjoyment, plus photo versions sometimes.
> 
> I’ll also be adding my own original ones soon
> 
> Enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How that chat began, and how the Phase 1 Riders got invited

_**Timeline: Shortly after the events of Movie War Mega Max** _

**Gentaro**

FRIENDS

**Shoutaro**

What the

**Eiji**

Gentaro-kun? What is it?

**Gentaro**

I just want you to know

That I love you guys as my senpai and pals

**Shoutaro**

Uh

Thanks kid

**Eiji**

Aw, thanks Gentaro-kun!

* * *

_**Timeline: Shortly after the final episodes of Kamen Rider Wizard** _

**Tsukasa**

YOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Haruto**

What the

Tsukasa?

**Tsukasa**

Yup that's me beeyatch. Expect more peeps to come

**Gentaro**

More friends?!

**Tsukasa**

Something like that

**Eiji**

Wth is going on

**Haruto**

I have a bad feeling about this already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Haruto was right. Immensely.


	2. Ankh Makes A Death Threat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember how back in HSHFTNEP, it's mentioned there was a bet made about when Eiji and Ankh would get togther? 
> 
> Ankh confronts the others about it.

_**Timeline: After Chapter 20 of HSHFTNEP** _

**Eiji**

Uh, guys

You wanna tell me something?

**Takeru**

Yes, Eiji-san?

**Eiji**

YOU FUCKERS BET ON US

**Haruto**

Did Eiji just curse?

**Emu**

Eiji-san?

**Eiji**

This is Ankh 

Which of you started the bet?!

**Shoutaro**

TSUKASA DID

**Tsukasa**

HIDARI YOU TRAITOR

**Eiji**

PREPARE TO DIE 

askjafsdoidsafdas

**Takeru**

Ankh-san?

**Eiji**

No, this is Eiji 

Got my phone away from him

But yeah, prepare to die Tsukasa

**Tsukasa**

GDI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's how Tsukasa died.


	3. Shoutaro Is Declared Property Of Philip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro once went undercover at a male beauty pageant and won. During the awards ceremony, the hostess then gave him a kiss on the cheek.
> 
> Philip, who’s very possessive of Shoutaro, proceeded to tackle the hostess, declared Shoutaro was off limits, and kissed his partner on national tv. 
> 
> This is the Riders’ reaction to it, and Double going on the chat after the kiss.

**_Timeline: Before Ex-Aid was active_ **

**Shinnosuke**

OMG Guys

**Takeru**

What is it Tomari-san?

**Shinnosuke**

Philip just kissed Shoutaro on TV

**Shouichi**

WHAT

**Eiji**

I’M IN AFRICA GDI

**Tsukasa**

Holy fucking crap

**Shinnosuke**

Hey, watch your tongue Kadoya!

There’s a child here!

**Kenzaki**

Holy eff they’re still at it

How long have they been at this?!

**Shinnosuke**

Five minutes now

**Kenzaki**

What the hell

**Ryoutaro**

sqpjrwefndasl

**Shinnosuke**

Ryoutaro? Are you ok?

**Ryoutaro**

He’s passed out - Momo

**Shinji**

I guess that they’re really out now huh

**Shinnosuke**

Yup. The just came out to the entirety of Japan

**Gentaro**

Love kitaaaaaaaaaa!

**Shinnosuke**

Also, Shoutaro is officially the most beautiful man in Fuuto

**Haruto**

Wait… Don’t tell me

Philip kissed him because…?

**Shinnosuke**

Yup. Boi was jealous

He literally knocked the hostess out

**Haruto**

WHAT.

**Shinnosuke**

Yup. Tackled her off the stage

Daimonji would be proud

**Eiji**

Uh...

* * *

**Shoutaro**

Sorry guys

Today was wild

**Shinnosuke**

I’ll bet

**Shoutaro**

Fuck you Tomari

Philip gave the hostess a concussion

**Eiji**

wtf omg 

**Philip**

She shouldn’t have kissed my Shoutaro

**Tsukasa**

“My Shoutaro” ffs

**Takeru**

“My Shoutaro” wow

**Shoutaro**

See, even the ghost boy thinks you’re too much

**Philip**

People must understand

That you are my partner

And mine alone

Perhaps you need reminding Aibou

**Shoutaro**

FFS PHILIP

**Souji**

OOOOHHH someone’s getting laid 

**Shoutaro**

SHUT UP TENDOU

**Eiji**

True tho

**Shoutaro**

GODDAMNIT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Shoutaro did. A lot.


	4. A Quick Group Chat Description

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick explanation of all the group chats and how they originated

**Kamen Rider Group Chat**

  * Where all the main Riders hang out
  * Was started by W, OOO, and Fourze when they met in Movie War Megamax
  * Haruto was added after his team up with Fourze
  * Tsukasa then added himself and the rest of the Phase 1 Riders after he met Haruto during the final episodes of Wizard
  * Since then, all main Riders are added after the big team up movies
  * Exceptions are Kouta, who was added after Heisei vs Showa, and Sento, who got added after he settled down into the Narumi Detective Agency with Ryuuga 
  * The group chat mostly contains nonsensical shenanigans and cursing at Tsukasa. 
  * Philip once accidentally sexted the group chat, and everyone’s reactions were greatly amusing
  * Tsukasa and Sento just sent their approval since they’re little shits, Ryoutaro keysmashed and was red as heck, Wataru, Emu, and Takeru were too mortified to reply; Haruto just watched the chaos unfold laughing his head off, Eiji was horrified because he stayed in a room next to them for a while, Gentaro sent out a confused “sex kita?”; Shinnosuke merely stated “That’s public indecency Hidari” with a frowny face, and the rest of the Phase 1 Riders were blushing from how raunchy it was (yes, even freaking Tendou was).
  * Shotuaro didn’t reply, because he was busy rushing home to “punish” Philip
  * As for the sext message itself… it’s way too raunchy for even Kari-chan to tell me XD



**The Riders B Squad Group Chat**

  * The group chat for all the secondary Riders
  * Was started by Gou and Ryu after the met in the Chaser Saga
  * Kaoru Ichijou is an honorary member
  * Geiz gets a lot of flack on this for his obvious crush on Sougo



**Girls Only Group Chat**

  * Aka the group chat for all the female companions of the Riders
  * Was started by Akari and Kiriko after they met in Movie Wars Genesis
  * They complain about their boys a lot in there
  * Natsumi also taught the other women the Secret Technique with this



**Other Group Chats**

  * SHIT IS GOING DOWN AGAIN: the chat used mostly for emergencies and the big team up events. Is serious at least 75% of the time. 
  * ONORE DECADE: if you want to rant about Tsukasa Kadoya, this is the place. Man himself is banned from joining, and Daiki has the most posts in this chat.
  * There’s also one where all the Taros interact with each other and you can only read their shenanigans. It’s that hilarious. 



**Quick Notes**

  * Kouta never used the group chat much after becoming a Space God, but Sento was able to make a stable connection for him to join in on the chaos
  * After Philip accidentally sexted the group chat, everyone agreed to move the group chats to a separate platform. Sento and Philip ended up coding a dedicated app for that 




	5. Haruto Accidentally Gives Everyone Boobs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haruto gets a new ring from Shunpei and things go horribly wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My first original chat. Enjoy!

**Sento**

GUYS I HAVE A PROBLEM

  
  
**Emu**

What is it Sento

I have problems of my own right now

**Sento**

JUST LOOK AT ME

**Sento**

(photo of Sento, but with breasts and longer hair) 

**Shinnosuke**

Oh Gaim, I thought I was only one!

**Emu**

Wait, you two are women too?! 

**Shouichi**

So am I!

**Kenzaki**

WTF ARE WE ALL WOMEN NOW?!

**Wataru**

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN TO US?!

**Haruto**

...oops

**Shoutaro**

Haruto... 

You wouldn’t happen to know anything about our transformations, would you?

**Haruto**

…

...Okay, this may have been my fault. 

**Sento**   
WHAT THE FUCK HARUTO?!

**Haruto**

I was just testing a new spell ring I got from Shunpei!

I had no idea that it would do… this to us!

**Sento**

WHY WOULD HE MAKE A SPELL RING THAT TURNS US ALL INTO WOMEN?!

**Haruto**

I have no idea

Don’t worry, though

Shunpei is working on a reverse spell ring right now

**Haruto**

(photo of Shunpei working on a new ring, now sporting a black eye)

**Shoutaro**

I’m assuming you gave him the black eye?

**Haruto**

Yep

Had to chase him down after I casted the spell

I am so sorry for this by the way

**Kouta**

Does that mean we’ll all be stuck like this until you reverse the spell?

**Haruto**

Guess so

**Shinnosuke**

Wait, you were affected too, Kouta?!

**Kouta**

Yes, and I am freaking out

Mai and my sis are helping me pick out some new clothes but it’s so embarrassing

**Kouta**

(photo of female Kouta with a red face trying out a skirt)

**Haruto**

Don’t you usually wear a skirt in your usual god attire?

**Kouta**

IT’S CALLED A TOGA!

**Haruto**

Anyway…

How is everyone coping? 

**Souji**

...Kagami has been laughing at me for an hour straight now

**Shinji**

Same with me and Ren

**Ryoutaro**

Awkward story

When Urataros first saw me, he tried flirting with me

Then I told him who I really was

Now he’s sulking in a corner

And Momo and the others are laughing their butts off

**Emu**

...Wow

**Eiji**

Hina made some clothes for me and I think they’re nice

**Eiji**

(photo of female Eiji in clothes that are clearly Ankh themed)

**Shoutaro**

Uh, Eiji

You do realize your clothes are themed after your boyfriend, right?

**Eiji**

OMG

I had no idea!

Ah, no wonder Gotou was snickering at me...

**Shinnosuke**

Kiriko has let me borrow some of her clothes

But she still wants to… do the do with me

Does that mean she’s technically bi now?

**Philip**

Actually I think the term is demi according to my research

Me and Shoutaro are doing fine

**Shoutaro**

Fine? 

You almost flashed at least three people today!

**Philip**

I was curious about the phenomenon… 

**Shoutaro**

Speaking of which...

Did you try to flash people too, Tsukasa?

**Tsukasa**

Do you really think that low of me, Shoutaro?

**Shoutaro**

...Yes.

**Tsukasa**

...I tried

Natsumi stopped me with the secret technique before I could really flaunt them though

**Shoutaro**

Figures

**Sougo**

Wait, you guys…

If I’m a woman now…

Do I have the best overlady of all time now? 

**Emu**

(；￣Д￣)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Later that day, Shunpei received a visit from the rest of the main Riders. It wasn't pretty.


	6. Tsukasa Claims He's Single

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaito and Tsukasa have a complicated relationship.
> 
> And something comes up that makes people assume things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea taken from Finalfantasyforever44657. Enjoy!

**Eiji**

Hey, Tsukasa

Care to explain this?

**Eiji**

(photo of Daiki chasing a guy in a red coat, murder in his eyes) 

**Tsukasa**

...Well, should’ve seen that coming

**Gentaro**

Isn’t that Marvelous? 

Why’s he being chased by Kaito?

**Tsukasa**

Well, Marvelous lost a bet and he had to kiss me on the cheek

And then Kaito just so happened to see it 

**Sougo**

So your boyfriend went berserk and went after him?

**Tsukasa**

He’s not my boyfriend!

**Sougo**

...Really? 

He flirts with you a lot though…

**Eiji**

And might I remind you of the first time we teamed up with those sentai people?

**Shoutaro**

And the time I once caught Kaito kissing you on the cheek?

**Tsukasa**

FOR THE LOVE OF

HE’S NOT MY afdsnasdfad;sjlf

**Sougo**

Tsukasa-senpai?

**Tsukasa**

Hello, this is Kaito Daiki, the very much boyfriend of Tsukasa Kadoya

Tsukasa-chan is currently unavailable right now as I’m busy punishing him for that kiss

See you <3

**Sougo**

...I knew it!

**Kenzaki**

Okay, who won the bet then?

**Philip**

Looks like Eiji this time

**Eiji**

Yay! \\(^ヮ^)/

More pantsu for me!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And for those wondering, Marvelous is fine. Just slightly bruised and Tsukasa ended up walking funny.


	7. Everyone Is A Little Gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One inside joke of the Riders: No one rides straight. 
> 
> This is why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea taken from 117!!🥳PARTY🥳PARTY🥳GIRL!!!711. Note, I haven't done much watching on the Phase 1 riders, so I apologize if they don’t get included much. Enjoy!

**Haruto**

So you have a crush on your secondary rider?

**Aruto**

Yes?

Is… this a problem with you guys?

**Tsukasa**

It’s fine

No one rides straight among us

**Aruto**

Eh? Really?

I thought… it was just...

**Shinnosuke**

I may be married to a woman, Aruto, but I admit I may have some… feelings for my partner

**Tsukasa**

I am pansexual and proud of it

**Emu**

I’m on the asexual spectrum

**Sougo**

I actually have a boyfriend AND a girlfriend 

**Kouta**

Same

**Sento**

****I have a very wonderful idiot husband, thank you very much

**Aruto**

...wow.

So…do any of you have some advice for me?

**Tsukasa**

He’ll probably be grumpy and deny he cares about you 75% of the time

But that’s just UST

**Aruto**

Really? 

We just have to bicker a lot?

**Sougo**

Yeah, just look at Shinji-senpai and Ren-senpai!

**Sougo**

(photo of Shinji and Ren making out)

**Shinji**

WTF 

I THOUGHT YUI DELETED THAT

HOW DID YOU GET THAT?!

**Sougo**

...Tsukasa-senpai told me he saved a copy?

**Shinji**

...

**Tsukasa**

...

I, uh, just remembered I needed to do something in another dimension!

Bye!

**Shinji**

ONORE DICKEIDO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That day, Tsukasa was being chased by Ryuki riding his dragon


	8. Kenzaki Humiliates Himself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenzaki has a huge crush on someone. No prizes for guessing who it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea from ?. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: Before Zi-O was active and Philip sent his accidental sext message_ **

**Emu**

****Um, Kenzaki

We need to talk

**Kenzaki**

Bout what?

**Emu**

I got this weird text on my phone

It seems to be a love letter of sorts?

**Kenzaki**

OMG

I DIDN’T MEAN TO SEND THAT TO YOU

I’M SO SORRY

**Emu**

It’s fine

But who’s Hajime?

**Tsukasa**

HAH!

I KNEW IT!

THEY ARE A THING!

**Kenzaki**

No we’re not!

**Shouichi**

Does that mean I lost the bet, Kadoya?

**Kenzaki**

ME AND HAJIME ARE NOT A COUPLE!

**Emu**

Really? 

That letter you accidentally gave me seems really…

Romantic of sorts

You gave up your humanity for him?

**Shoutaro**

He did? 

Sweet mother of Gaim, you’re about as subtle as Sento and Ryuuga

**Sento**

What’s that supposed to mean?!

**Kenzaki**

...I give up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kenzaki later crawled into a hole that day


	9. Aruto Gets Drunk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aruto has too much alcohol, and starts babbling on too much during a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another 117!!🥳PARTY🥳PARTY🥳GIRL!!!711 idea. Enjoy!

**Aruto**

Hello, everyone 

This is Isamu 

I understand he might’ve caused some trouble today at the party you were having

**Emu**

You got that right

Look at this

**Emu**

(photo of a drunk Aruto doing the can-can with equally drunk Shouichi and Haruto)

**Aruto**

...Where the heck did he get the rubber chicken and feather boa?

**Emu**

I have no idea 

**Shinnosuke**

Thank you for picking him up as soon as we called, though

The others were suggesting they should go graffiti ZAIA’s office building

**Aruto**

...I would’ve permitted that

**Emu**

Figures

From what I heard that Gai person of yours is a real jerk

**Tsukasa**

By the way...

Is it true you like it rough with Aruto?

**Aruto**

W-WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM?!

**Shinnosuke**

Kadoya, why are you asking something so inappropriate?!

**Tsukasa**

Oh, when Aruto drunk like six shots of vodka he started rambling about his sex life to us

It was hilarious

**Aruto**

H-HE DID?!

**Tsukasa**

Yep 

He also told us you were kinky and you like him best when he’s wearing suits...

**Aruto**

(o-_-o)

**Emu**

Great, Tsukasa, you broke him 

**Tsukasa**

Worth it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Aruto woke up the next day, he turned redder than Drive when Isamu told him about what happened. Then pictures of the party went sent to Aruto and he blushed even more.


	10. Eiji Gets Called Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eiji has a troublesome boyfriend and truths come to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another original chat. Enjoy!

**Haruto**

Um, Eiji

There’s a problem with your boyfriend

**Eiji**

What did you do, Haruto-kun?

**Haruto**

Well, he wanted me to turn him into a peacock like one of his Core Medals

But instead, this happened

**Haruto**

(photo of a pigeon but with red feathers)

**Eiji**

...You turned Ankh into a pigeon?

**Haruto**

Yes, and then Ankh gave me a black eye because of it 

But don’t worry, it’ll wear off in a few hours

**Sento**

A few hours?!

How are we supposed to deal with him for a few hours?!

**Eiji**

You’re taking care of him, Sento?

**Sento**

Actually, the whole agency is

And he’s a pain 

**Sento**

(photo of Pigeon Ankh pecking on Ryuuga’s head) 

**Shoutaro**

He also pooped on my Windscale!

That was my favorite!

Can’t you come pick up your boyfriend already and get him to stop?!

**Eiji**

I’ll get to the agency as soon as I can

But Ankh does whatever the hell he wants

I don’t think I can really make him stop

**Sento**

...Wow, you’re whipped

**Eiji**

Eh?!

I’m whipped?!

The one who’s whipped around here is you, Shoutaro!

**Shoutaro**

WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!

I AM NOT WHIPPED!

**Sento**

...Oh Gaim, you’re right, Eiji

Philip has you whipped alright, Shoutaro

**Shoutaro**

Where’s your proof?!

**Sento**

(photo of Shoutaro and Philip wearing a pair of matching cat costumes)

**Haruto**

Wow

So much for hard boiled, huh? 

**Shoutaro**

...Dammit

**Sento**

Don’t feel too bad, Shoutaro

I think Shinnosuke is whipped, too

**Shinnosuke**

HEY!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Eiji later came to pick up Ankh, Shoutaro was sulking in the corner.


	11. Riders Hate Fangirls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever wondered what the rest of the Riders were thinking during Heisei Generations Forever? This is what went down back in the chats, and how they react to our fandom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by MLPMeetsMC. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: Before final battle of Heisei Generations Forever, then shortly after_ **

**Philip**

Okay

Everyone here?

**Haruto**

Yep, bad guys down!

**Shoutaro**

That’s good

Okay, role call time

Who’re you with?

Me and Philip got Ryotaro and Yusuke 

**Takeru**

I’m with Hojo-sensei!

**Kouta**

Wataru’s with me

**Haruto**

I have Shouichi and Shinji at my side

**Kenzaki**

Takumi and Hitoshi are in my group

**Gentaro**

Tendou-senpai and Tsukasa-senpai are fighting with me!

**Shinnosuke**

I got Eiji

**Shoutaro**

Good, so we’re all accounted for

Any word on Sento and Ryuuga? 

**Eiji**

No answer from them

I think they’re busy with Sougo

**Kenzaki**

Wait, did anyone see that?

**Shoutaro**

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?!

**Shinnosuke**

Might I suggest we follow it? 

**Yusuke**

Agreed 

Come on, Riders, we got work to do!

* * *

**Yusuke**

...Well, I’m beat

**Sento**

Tell me about it 

**Takumi**

What the heck is wrong with that world though?!

Why do people think me and Kusaka had a thing?!

**Haruto**

And why do my fans say I have it bad for Nitoh?!

**Ryotaro**

Why is everyone making porn about me and Momotaros?!

**Emu**

Might I add the freaking horde of fangirls?!

Aren’t our shows aimed at freaking kids?!

**Tsukasa**

Guys

Let’s be honest with ourselves

Outside of the suits, we’re all very attractive men

What woman wouldn’t watch our shows for just THAT?

**Shoutaro**

...Good point

**Sougo**

Hey, is Kouta-san okay, you guys?

He’s seemed a bit out of place since we got back...

**Kouta**

...Have I ever mentioned that I have mind reading powers?

**Sento**

Oh no

You accidentally saw porn of yourself from the fangirls, didn’t you?

**Kouta**

Worse

I saw porn of YOU guys

**Sento**

...You have my sympathy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Kouta couldn’t look at any of his fellow Riders for a week.


	12. Riders Kick Gai’s Butt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Riders have found out about what Gai Amatasu did and have vowed to all Rider Kick his ass. 
> 
> This is the result.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zero One related stuff inside. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: After episode 30 of Zero One_ **

**Aruto**

Senpai

I appreciate all the help you given me already

But are you sure you want to help me fight Amatsu?

**Emu**

Aruto-kun 

From what you have told about him, he reminds me too much of Kuroto Dan

Which means he’s also an asshole

**Takeru**

...Did Hojo-sensei just curse?

**Sento**

I do not appreciate Kamen Riders being called tools

**Kouta**

Me too

**Haruto**

Me three

**Shinnosuke**

Nobody insults the good name of Kamen Riders like us and gets away with it, Aruto

**Aruto**

Okay, fine 

You can all help

Final blow goes to me though, okay?

**Sento**

Roger

Now let’s kick Gai’s ass!

* * *

**Shoutaro**

Well, I believe that went well

**Sento**

Agree

**Kouta**

Don’t you think it was a bit overkill that we left the guy in a full body cast, though?

**Emu**

Overkill is best overkill

**Sougo**

Oh yeah

Congrats on the new boyfriend, by the way, Aruto-san!

**Aruto**

T-Thanks

I still can’t believe Isamu just kissed me in front of all of you guys

(⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄)

**Tsukasa**

Now that I think about it…

**Shoutaro**

Tsukasa, we can’t talk about it in here

Aruto’s still here, remember?

**Aruto**

Guys, it’s fine

I already know about the bet

**Emu**

Wait, really?

What’s your source?

**Aruto**

Izu

She knows everything

Like your contact info, Kouta-san’s past jobs, and Tsukasa’s arrest records

**Tsukasa**

E-EH?!

**Sougo**

I saw that last part coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, Emu won the bet this time. He spent it on new video games that Parad fawned over immediately. And nobody was surprised that Tsukasa was arrested.


	13. Haruto Is A Wimp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember how Haruto accidentally ruined Shun’s proposal at the end of Fourze? 
> 
> Shun meets Haruto officially and is not happy at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has to be one of the most crack-iest things I made so far. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Uh, Haruto-senpai

**Haruto**

Yes?

**Sougo**

There’s a video of you online getting tackled while Gentaro-senpai and this other guy try to pull him off you

Then this huge fight ensues 

**Tsukasa**

It’s hilarious ∗˚(* ˃̤൬˂̤ *)˚∗

**Haruto**

WTF 

WHO FILMED THAT 

**Gentaro**

JK must’ve done that

I’m gonna get him to apologize, Haruto-san

**Kenzaki**

Wait, wait, wait

Why the hell did this guy tackle you?

**Gentaro**

Well, a couple of years ago

Shun tried proposing to Miu

But then she saw this guy with this huge ring walking by and was like “I want an engagement ring like that!”

So this other day, Haruto was visiting me

And Shun went, 

“YOU! YOU RUINED MY PROPOSAL!” 

**Wataru**

...You accidentally ruined a marriage proposal, Haruto?

**Haruto**

Not intentionally!

How was I supposed to know women liked fancy jewels?

**Emu**

...Haruto, all women like fancy jewels. 

**Haruto**

...Oh.

Anyway, next thing I know, Gentaro’s friend tackle me to the ground, screaming about what I done, and believe me, I was not prepared for that, even though I’m a Rider

**Gentaro**

Then I try to pull Shun off with Ryusei while the rest of my friends are watching

Then this huge fight ensued 

By the time we managed to get Shun away from Haruto, I told him that Haruto had no intentions of ruining his proposal, so he apologized 

**Haruto**

He did made him apologize for being there, though, before he said he was sorry

Could he have apologized for nearly busting my ribs?

**Eiji**

Really?

Omg

**Tsukasa**

It happened because you’re a twink, Haruto

**Haruto**

A twink?!

Aren’t Sento and Philip the nerds around here?!

**Sento**

HEY!

I’ll have you know, me and Philip work out regularly, thank you very much!

**Tsukasa**

Plus, you keep gorging on your donuts and using your magic just to change your clothes, Haruto

You’re the living definition of lazy

**Wataru**

...He has a point

**Haruto**

THAT’S IT, DECADE!

I’M GONNA KILL YOU!

**Tsukasa**

TRY ME, WIMPY WIZARD!

**Haruto**

YOU’RE GONNA GO TO HELL FOR THAT INSULT!

**Sougo**

…Er….

**Kouta**

Mom, get dad before things turn ugly.

**Emu**

STOP CALLING ME MOM!

But yeah, me and Tomari-san will stop them

**Sento**

...I’m surrounded by idiots. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Later that day, Haruto and Tsukasa's fight was stopped by Shinnosuke and Emu, who both gave them a death glare so terrifying they calmed down.


	14. Tsukasa Discovers Something Terrible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: according to science, magenta technically doesn’t exist. 
> 
> Tsukasa discovers this awful truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since it’s hiatus season now, I’ll try to update frequently as I can so we can all find some new Rider goodness in this trying time. Also, I apologize if you start cringing as you read this chapter. Enjoy!

**Aruto**

Um, senpai

We have a problem

**Sougo**

What kind of problem, Aruto-san?

**Aruto**

Well it all started when some of my employees told me that there was this guy raiding the break room fridge

Then they told me the guy said to back off since he had “Rider privileges” or something like that 

So they want me to come to the break room and clear things up with the guy

**Ryotaro**

Let me guess

It was Tsukasa?

**Aruto**

Yep

**Takumi**

He always raids my fridge when he comes to visit me 

(￣︿￣)

**Aruto**

Anyway

So I come into the break room and Tsukasa-san’s surrounded by my employees 

Then one employee tells me “Thanks for coming sir, can you please get this pink man away from the fridge?”

Tsukasa-san got mad and tells my employee he’s magenta

When suddenly, Izu tells him “Tsukasa-san, technically magenta doesn’t exist”

**Sougo**

...Really?

  
  


**Philip**

Yeah

I think I remember looking up that once 

**Aruto**

Izu then went into a long explanation about how magenta isn’t real

Tsukasa-senpai was silent for like a minute, then this happened

**Aruto**

(photo of Tsukasa crawled into a fetal position, with a HumaGear poking him) 

**Tendou**

...Wow.

**Yusuke**

I think Izu just broke the Destroyer of Worlds

**Wataru**

Serves him right

(︶︹︶)

**Aruto**

Senpai!

He’s been like that for a few hours now!

I have no idea what to do with him

**Shoutaro**

I’ll tell Tsukasa’s friends and get them to pick him up

**Aruto**

Thank you, Shoutaro-senpai

**Shinnosuke**

Still can’t believe science would make Tsukasa turn into… that

**Sento**

Never underestimate science, Shinnosuke-san

**Takeru**

Is Tsukasa-san gonna be okay, though?

**Shoutaro**

Eh, he’ll be okay

He’s just being overdramatic

**Gentaro**

Overdramatic?! 

It’s like he lost his purpose in life! 

We have to help him, he’s our bud right?!

**Haruto**

Gen, you’re too pure for your own good

**Aruto**

Hey, wait a minute

**Sougo**

Oh no

**Shoutaro**

Here it comes...

**Aruto**

Magenta wa iro janai?! Maji-n da?!

Hai, Aruto janai to!

**Hitoshi**

....

**Eiji**

…

**Kenzaki**

…

**Emu**

...

**Kouta**

…

**Shouichi**

(*´艸`*)

...Well, color me impressed, Aruto-kun!

I sure feel tickled pink at that!

**Aruto**

(╯✧▽✧)╯

Finally, someone who appreciates my jokes!

You have enlightened me, oh great Rider of Light!

(◕‿◕)♡

**Shoutaro**

What the?!

**Shinji**

Oh no, there’s two of them!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aruto and Shouichi continued making puns on the group chat for the next hour, much to everyone else’s exasperation.


	15. Sougo Has His First Gay Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember that infamous shirtless photo of Geiz, Chase, and Kouta’s actors? 
> 
> Sougo stumbles upon it one day, and is now questioning his sexuality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another adaption from Kari-chan’s blog, this time with photos! It also takes place on the “SHIT IS GOING DOWN AGAIN” group chat. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: After the events of Heisei Generations Forever_ **

**Sougo**

Uh, guys

**Shoutaro**

What is it 

We’re kind of busy here

**Sougo**

Well… 

IthinkIjustturnedgay

**Ryuuga**

We’re all a little bit gay here kid

**Sougo**

Not me

I’m pretty sure I was straight

UNTIL THIS

**Sougo**

**Geiz**

SOUGO

WTH

**Rinko**

Oh my ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Shinnosuke**

Wait 

Isn’t that…

**Gou**

CHASE?!

AND FRUIT JESUS?!

**Kouta**

I’m not Fruit Jesus ffs

And that isn’t me! I swear!

**Sougo**

It gets worse

**Sougo**

**Kouta**

WHAT 

THE 

FUCK

**Ryuuga**

MY EYES

**Shinnosuke**

nopenopenopenope

**Geiz**

Gdi Sougo!

**Gou**

FFS I HAVEN’T EVEN SEEN CHASE NAKED YET

**Shinnosuke**

I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW THAT EITHER!

**Rinko**

As a woman, I can say

You are one lucky boy, Sougo-kun.

**Sougo**

Rinko-san!

**Rinko**

What? I’m sure Tsukuyomi agrees

**Tsukuyomi**

Yes I do.

**Sougo**

Tsukuyomi?!

**Geiz**

Should I be worried?

**Philip**

As the fans say

When in doubt

OT3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Kouta became catatonic for hours and Gou proceeded to dunk his head into the nearest bucket of water.


	16. Tsukuyomi Is Tired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile on the Girls’ chat, Tsukuyomi talks about her idiot boyfriends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another adaption of Kari-chan’s works. Enjoy!

**Tsukuyomi**

Ugh

I am so done with their shit 

**Kiriko**

The boys are fighting again, huh?

**Tsukuyomi**

Yes

**Akari**

What is it about this time?

**Tsukuyomi**

About onigiri this time

**Yuuki**

Onigiri?

**Tsukuyomi**

Yeah

Sougo’s uncle made too much

Now they’re trying to stuff each other full

**Rinko**

Boys

They really are stupid as fuck

**Akiko**

You can always try Natsumi-chan’s trick

**Tsukuyomi**

Her trick?

**Akari**

Yeah

It works like a charm every time on Takeru

**Rinko**

Takeru gives you hell?

But yeah

It works on Haruto and Shunpei too

**Kiriko**

I tried it on Gou and it worked better than anything I’ve ever done

**Tsukuyomi**

What trick is this? 

I gotta know

I’m going to go insane dealing with these two

**Rinko**

I’m about to off shift in a bit

I’ll swing by your place and teach you

It’s called the Hikari Secret Technique: Laughing Pressure Point

**Tsukuyomi**

Sounds… weird

I like it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Sougo had a strange feeling that something bad will happen to him and it would all be Decade’s fault.


	17. Sougo Is Tsukasa's Only Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember that… somewhat suggestive scene with Tsukasa and Sougo back in Zi-O?
> 
> This is everyone’s reaction to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No hate on Tsukasa, he’s just the resident friend that nobody likes among the Riders. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Tsukasa Kadoya

We need to talk

**Tsukasa**

What is it this time?

**Shoutaro**

**Shoutaro**

EXPLAIN

**Emu**

OMG

You do realize Sougo’s underage, don’t you?!

**Sento**

Kamen Rider Decade… a pedophile

**Shinnosuke**

Shame on you! (;｀O´)o

**Wataru**

For some reason, I am not surprised that you would stoop this low...

**Tsukasa**

Okay, look

I may have caused a few apocalypses

And I may have led Shocker in my past life

And I may cause some kind of trouble every time I show up in this world…

BUT I AM NO PEDO!!!

**Sougo**

Senpai!

It’s not what it looks like!

**Emu**

You sure?

**Shinnosuke**

Sougo-kun, you can tell us…

**Sougo**

Senpai, he was just trying to help me!

He’s actually really nice to me!

Most of the time, anyway...

**Tsukasa**

Thank you

See? The kid’s okay!

**Shoutaro**

Are you sure you’re not corrupting him?

**Tsukasa**

I am not!

**Sougo**

Hey, Tsukasa-senpai

**Tsukasa**

Yes?

**Sougo**

(photo of Sougo with Tsukasa’s camera)

**Tsukasa**

How did you?!

**Sougo**

Considering this payback for eating my dinner (^_−)☆

**Tsukasa**

You little…! 

**Wataru**

...He’s corrupting him. (￢_￢;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa tried to attack Sougo later, but was subdued by Woz who was still angry at Decade for interrupting his usual Iwae speech.


	18. The Girls Plan A Massacre

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another snippet from the girl’s chat, this time about them worrying about their boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request from FF7RFAN:):3^_^. Enjoy!

**Tsukuyomi**

Girls

I’m worried

**Yuuki**

About what?

**Tsukuyomi**

Sougo-kun’s been hanging out with Tsukasa a lot lately 

And I think he’s corrupting him 

Sougo-kun’s been much more… mischievous lately

**Natsumi**

That’s bad

**Kiriko**

Oh god, I just realized Kadoya might’ve corrupted my husband too

Shinnosuke seems much more cross with Gou lately… 

**Rinko**

Haruto’s been pranking Nitoh a lot thanks to Tsukasa’s encouragement 

**Akari**

And Tsukasa taught Takeru a curse word (￣︿￣)

**Natsumi**

Girls

This is gonna be a huge problem soon

There’s only thing to do in a situation like this

**Tsukuyomi**

..Does it involve bodily harm?

**Natsumi**

Yes

**Tsukuyomi**

Then we’re all in

I have a spare blaster for anyone who needs it

**Kiriko**

I’ll get Rinna to get my special boots

Has enough power to rival a Rider Kick

**Akiko**

Time to get my favorite slipper!

**Misora**

Does anyone have extra pointy things I can throw?

**Poppy**

This is gonna be fun <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> During the fight later, the boys watched and made bets about which girl will put Tsukasa down first while munching on snacks.


	19. Tsukasa Exposes Everyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa likes visiting our world… mostly because he has an easy source of blackmail photos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains lots of photos. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

OMG guys you gotta check this out

**Shoutaro**

If this is another stupid meme site or something, I will hunt you down

**Tsukasa**

Remember that world where we were just works of fiction?

Things out they have photos of everything

Including the embarrassing moments! 

**Emu**

...This is not good.

**Tsukasa**

First up, the sight of an idiot in a tree

**Tsukasa**

****

**Emu**

How the heck did you get up there with your bike?

**Ryotaro**

I honestly don’t remember 

**Tsukasa**

Here we have Shoutaro and his infamous meme face 

**Tsukasa**

**Sento**

...Are you sure you’re hard boiled, Shoutaro? 

**Shoutaro**

Shut up, Sento!

**Tsukasa**

Next, we got vending machine troubles with Eiji 

**Tsukasa**

**Takumi**

Why are you trying to ride that, Eiji? 

**Eiji**

It usually transforms into my bike, okay?!

**Tsukasa**

This is Haruto being an over dramatic idiot 

**Tsukasa**

**Hitoshi**

...Should I ask?

**Haruto**

I don’t wanna talk about it 

**Tsukasa**

And my personal favorite…

**Tsukasa**

**Kenzaki**

...What the heck are you doing, Kouta?

**Kouta**

...Practicing my henshin poses?

Don’t you all do that?

**Shinnosuke**

No?

**Gentaro**

I do!

**Haruto**

Man, you’re such an idiot, Kazuraba 

**Kouta**

Come on, stop disrespecting Fruit Jesus here!

**Eiji**

...Did you just call yourself Fruit Jesus?

**Kouta**

...Shit

**Sento**

(*≧艸≦)

Congratulations, Mr. Space God

Now we have no excuse to not call you Fruit Jesus

**Kouta**

ONORE DICKEIDO!

**Sougo**

How is this Tsukasa-senpai’s fault?

**Tsukasa**

I was the one who came up with Fruit Jesus in the first place (^_−)☆

**Kouta**

THAT’S IT, DECADE!

I’M GONNA SMITE YOU!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa spent the rest of his day hiding under Sougo’s bed.


	20. Riders Are Scared Of Ladies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As an old saying goes, “Behind every great man is an equally great woman.” 
> 
> This is that line for the Riders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a continuation for chapter 18. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Um, Tsukasa-senpai

I think Tsukuyomi and the other girls are planning to beat you up

**Tsukasa**

...Should I be worried? 

I mean, aren’t there only a couple of Riders among them?

**Philip**

Akiko is actually really good with that slipper of hers

Once knocked out a Dopant with it

**Eiji**

Hina has super strength

She can lift up a rock easily

**Gentaro**

I’m pretty sure Tomoko’s hexes actually work on people

**Haruto**

Rinko is very good with lots of firearms

**Kouta**

Mai’s my fellow Space Goddess, remember?

**Shinnosuke**

Kiriko is a very good police officer

And she has special boots that allows her feet to have the power of a Rider Kick

**Takeru**

Akari likes explosive experiments a lot 

**Sento**

And Misora has very good aim when it comes to throwing sharp pointy objects

**Tsukasa**

…

I’m screwed, aren’t I?

**Shoutaro**

Yep

And you’re on your own for this, Tsukasa

**Souji**

Anyone want to watch the whole thing?

I’ll bring snacks

**Kenzaki**

I do!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the girls beat Tsukasa up, he got on his knees and begged for mercy. And Haruto tapped the whole thing.


	21. Shoutaro Is Tired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alongside Sougo, Shoutaro is the only one willing to be nice to Tsukasa sometimes. 
> 
> But even he has his limits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request from GNR2018. Also rather short and just between two people. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Tsukasa

There’s been complaints from tourists in Fuuto that they’ve been receiving bad photographs from this guy they asked to take photos of them

When I asked what the guy looked like, they described you 

Explain?

**Tsukasa**

They saw me with my camera and assumed things 

And I didn’t know how to turn them down?

**Shoutaro**

Why do you even carry that camera around anyway if you can’t take a decent photo to save your life?

**Tsukasa**

It’s my thing

Can’t I have it, like you and your private eye stuff?

**Shoutaro**

...Just give the tourists the money back

**Tsukasa**

Uh… we might have a problem with that 

**Shoutaro**

...What did you do?

**Tsukasa**

Kaito just stole my wallet and the money a few minutes ago

**Shoutaro**

(；￣Д￣)

I’ll help you get it back

And if you’re lying, I’m punching you in the face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa was telling the truth. And Daiki was punched instead. 


	22. The Phase 1 Riders Do Something Stupid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alcohol and Riders don’t mix. That’s the law. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Swedishfanofkamenrider3. Also short. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Okay

Can anybody explain to me why all my predecessors are in the hospital?

**Ryotaro**

Momotaros here

I think I can explain this to the best of my abilities

Apparently at the party they were talking about that time we fought those Showa Riders

Remind you, they’re all drunk

And that’s when they decide to do something stupid 

**Shinnosuke**

...What kind of stupid?

**Ryotaro**

Something along the lines of “Hey, let’s go prank Hongo Takeshi himself!”

**Emu**

...I’m assuming things went horribly wrong?

**Ryotaro**

Indeed

He kicked all our butts

Anyway, are any of you going to help pay the hospital bill?

**Shoutaro**

...Whoever bought the alcohol is paying. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa was the one who ended up paying the hospital bill.


	23. Shoutaro Is A Bastion Of Sanity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paperwork: a Rider’s worst enemy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Behold, more original stuff. Requests are being worked on. Enjoy! 

**Sougo**

Um guys 

Guess who I found hiding under my bed? 

**Shoutaro**

Was it Woz or Tsukasa? 

**Tsukasa**

Stop assuming it was me!

**Sougo**

(photo of Aruto hiding under Sougo’s bed)

**Aruto**

Senpai!

I told you not to tell anyone about me!

**Shoutaro**

Aruto, get out from under there

**Aruto**

But guys!

I have paperwork!

I can’t handle it anymore!

Besides, I have people who agree with me

**Shoutaro**

What do you mean?

**Sougo**

Look who I just found

**Sougo**

(photo of Emu and Shinnosuke hiding in Sougo’s closet)

**Tsukasa**

...Bout time you two came out of the closet

**Emu**

Shut up, Decade!

**Shoutaro**

What the hell, you two

**Takeru**

You’re supposed to be good influences, Mom and Dad!

**Emu**

Will you stop calling us that?!

Cut us some slack!

I haven’t been to update my island all week on Animal Crossing!

**Shinnosuke**

And I’ve been slowly losing my sanity 

Let me have this!

**Shoutaro**

...I’m telling your friends

**Emu**

WAIT NO-

**Shinnosuke**

KIRIKO’S GONNA KILL ME!

**Aruto**

HAVE MERCY!

**Sento**

Wow, I’m surprised you kept the sanity ball, Shoutaro

**Shoutaro**

What can I say, with all the stuff I’ve been dealing with over the years, you need to have a straight head

Plus I find my own way to keep myself entertained during paperwork 

**Gentaro**

I think we should dub you the Cool Uncle of us

**Shoutaro**

That’s catchy… I like it 

**Eiji**

Who gets to be the cool aunt, though?

**Kouta**

I’d say probably Haruto

**Haruto**

HEY!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The three runaways were then handcuffed to their desks until they finished their paperwork.


	24. Riders Do Taxes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sougo asks a weird question to Tsukasa. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another request from GNR2018. Also kind of short. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Um, Tsukasa-senpai

Do you commit tax evasion? 

**Tsukasa**

W-What?!

Where did this come from?!

**Takeru**

Me and Sougo were wondering if you guys paid taxes or anything

Then we got to you…

**Tsukasa**

I’ll have you know that I do my taxes!

I’m pretty sure I also made my old Shocker team do their taxes as well!

**Sougo**

...Really, senpai?

**Tsukasa**

Yeah, you can have Shoutaro check

Anyway, if anyone committing tax evasion, it’s Mr. Donut Lover over here

**Haruto**

I’M STILL HERE, YOU KNOW!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro checked and found Haruto did commit tax evasion. He promptly got a huge scolding from Emu and Shinnosuke. 


	25. Riders Are Troublesome

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, on the secondary riders chat, the boys chat about how troublesome their mains are. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Tantan15. Enjoy!

**Ryu**

Ugh

I hate my life sometimes

**Shintaro**

What’s wrong, Terui?

**Ryu**

Philip made the microwave explode

**Ryuuga**

Omg, really?

**Ryu**

Why do you think we banned him from cooking in the kitchen without Hidari? 

This isn’t even the first time this happened

**Ryuuga**

Wow

I thought I was the only one who problems with my main rider

**Hikawa**

We all have problems 

I love Shouichi, but his puns drive me nuts all the time

**Kagami**

Tendou once turned down a guy offering to take a picture of us because “you can’t possibly capture my beauty” 

**Yuuto**

Ryotaro once brought a whole swarm of mosquitos onto the Den-Liner

I got bit like ten times

**Daiki**

Tsukasa gets chased on a daily basis 

**Ryusei**

Gentaro once tried to do his pose on an ice skating rink

Ended up tripping on himself and got a bloody nose

**Nitoh**

Haruto once flubbed a teleportation spell and ended up at least ten feet in the air

**Fukami**

Even though Takeru-kun’s not a ghost anymore he still tries walking through walls to avoid his chores

**Hiiro**

Hojo once tripped over ten flights of stairs and landed on me

**Geiz**

Sougo once tried to assert his kingship over a pack of chickens

He got pecked on for his troubles

**Ryu**

...Why do we even bother with these idiots?

**Date**

Because they would’ve already killed themselves if we weren’t around?

**Kaoru**

True, Date 

**Gou**

Wait a sec

Did you guys hear that the entire power grid in Fuuto suddenly went out?

**Ryu**

…FOR THE LOVE OF GAIM!

**Ryuuga**

Why did I even marry that insufferable genius...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sento didn’t get to have sex that night.


	26. Chase Gives TMI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Want to know the problem of having a boyfriend with no social graces? This is it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An original chat. This takes place on a chat I like to call “the Narumi Agency chat”, starring the main cast from HSHFTNEP. Enjoy!

**Chase**

Shoutaro… 

What is the best way to please your partner in the bedroom? 

**Shoutaro**

****W-WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM?!

**Gou**

CHASE!

WHY ARE YOU ASKING SHOUTARO THAT KIND OF QUESTION?!

**Chase**

...I want to be able to sexually satisfy you

And Shinnosuke told me it was uncomfortable to talk about it with him

**Gou**

YOU’VE BEEN TELLING SHIN-NII-SAN ABOUT OUR SEX LIFE?!

**Chase**

Yes?

**Gou**

OH GAIM

No wonder he couldn’t look at me straight in the eye for the last few weeks 

Or why he’s been stress eating his milk candies a lot 

**Shoutaro**

Chase

You can’t just talk about your sex life with anyone

**Chase**

I can’t?

Don’t Sento and Philip do it all the time?

**Shoutaro**

That’s because they’re comfortable talking about it

Shinnosuke, however, isn’t comfortable about learning your sex life

You’ve probably given him some bad mental images

**Chase**

...Like how the rest of my friends caught me and Gou having sex in the Drive Pit?

**Gou**

I TOLD YOU NOT TO TALK ABOUT THAT!

**Shoutaro**

...Like that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gou then started banging his head on a wall before he went over to apologize to Shinnosuke. 


	27. Sougo Wears Tights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sougo actually does ballet, like his actor. 
> 
> Riders found out about it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This post contains a video link. Enjoy!

**Sento**

Hey Sougo

**Sougo**

Yes senpai? 

**Sento**

What are you gonna do now, if you’re not gonna be a king?

**Sougo**

Oh, that’s easy

I’m thinking about opening a dance studio 

**Shoutaro**

Wait, wait, wait

You dance?

**Sougo**

Yep!

**Sougo**

[ **https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2xDv5OAQDA** ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2xDv5OAQDA)

**Philip**

Fascinating!

**Tsukasa**

Wow, kid

I didn’t know you do ballet

**Sougo**

I took dance lessons as a kid

I even wanted to be a professional dancer

I think I have an old photo from one of my recitals... 

**Sougo**

(photo of Sougo doing a full leg split in a ballet costume) 

**Sento**

...Whoa

**Emu**

I can’t freaking believe this

**Philip**

He’s good

**Tsukasa**

So you have really good flexibility, huh? ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Shoutaro**

SHUT IT, DECADE!

**Sougo**

...What’s that supposed to mean?

Wait

Oh crap!

**Shoutaro**

...Did something happen?

**Sougo**

Geiz was looking at our chat 

And he suddenly got a nosebleed

What should I do? 

**Emu**

Calm down and get some tissues for him

Make sure he’s pinching the top of nose to prevent more bleeding

And make him hold it for a couple of minutes

**Sougo**

Thanks, Mom

I have no idea what caused it though…

Wait, Geiz said something about the photo

**Tsukasa**

...those ballet costumes are really form fitting, kid

**Sougo**

ヾ(〃ﾟーﾟ〃)ノ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Tsukuyomi saw the photo, she passed out from blood loss.


	28. Sento Has No Shame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Sento is like a rabbit when it comes to his sex drive. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning, this is very cracky. Enjoy!

**Shinnosuke**

SENTO KIRYU!

DO YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF PROPRIETARY?!

**Sento**

I said I was sorry

**Shoutaro**

What did he do this time?

**Shinnosuke**

HE AND HIS HUSBAND WERE ABOUT TO DO IT IN THE SIU

**Shoutaro**

OMG SENTO

Wasn’t defiling the garage couch bad enough?!

Or groping each other the first time you got together with Ryuuga?!

**Sento**

Okay, maybe I am bad

But at least my boyfriend doesn’t grope me in public, unlike Eiji’s over here!

**Eiji**

Ankh has a high sex drive, okay?!

But at least it’s just him, unlike Aruto and his boyfriend! 

**Aruto**

H-hey!

At least me and Isamu keep these things inside the bedroom!

Unlike Tsukasa and his boyfriend over here

Who I caught doing it IN MY OFFICE!  
  
  


**Tsukasa**

No regrets over that (^_-)—☆

**Philip**

Wait, is everyone talking about their sex life now?

Should I add the adventures of me and Shoutaro?

**Shoutaro**

PHILIP, NO!

**Shinji**

...Wow

**Wataru**

Why are all my successors like this...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro promptly told Sento to just get his own place already so he and Philip could have some peace and quiet.


	29. Emu Is Grateful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Emu is okay with being the Mom Friend for once. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A request by GNR2018. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: After the following story found here:_ ** [ **_https://archiveofourown.org/works/23170780/chapters/58074070_ ** ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23170780/chapters/58074070)

**Takeru**

Hojo-sensei

Did you get the gifts we sent you?

**Emu**

Yes 

I like the hoodie you sent me by the way

**Takeru**

Thanks!

I had it custom made!

**Emu**

Everyone

I don’t know what to say about all the Mother’s Day gifts

**Kouta**

You’re not just the Mom Friend, Emu

You’re a fellow Rider and we must always look out for each other

Especially in this time of crisis

Hope you like the food I sent you

**Gentaro**

And the nice extra sets of clothes

**Philip**

And the toiletries I researched

**Eiji**

And tomorrow’s underwear!

**Emu**

Thank you all so much, everyone

...Wait a minute

WTF KENZAKI

WHY WOULD YOU SEND ME THIS?!   


**Kenzaki**

...You needed a good way to let off some steam?

**Emu**

I AM ASEXUAL, KENZAKI

I DON’T NEED STUFF LIKE THIS!   
****

**Haruto**

...You got him a sex toy, didn’t you?

**Kenzaki**

Yep (^_−)☆

**Shinnosuke**

Mother of Gaim, you’re as bad as Kadoya…

**Tsukasa**

What’s that supposed to mean?!

**Sougo**

Since when were Kenzaki-san and Hojo-san friends?

**Kenzaki**

We met in this weird virtual world with a bunch of dead Riders 

I’ve been having fun with him ever since

**Emu**

...More like annoying me ever since (￣︿￣)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, Kenzaki got Emu a vibrator. Which Poppy found and things got awkward real fast.


	30. Shinnosuke Gets Embarrassed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, everyone knows Shinnosuke’s real first born is Takeru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entry is dedicated to Yukihiro Takiguchi, Akira Hayase’s actor who passed away a few months ago. Nice drive, buddy. Enjoy!

**Kouta**

Hey, does anyone know if Shinnosuke is letting people visit him yet?

I’m worried about him

**Shoutaro**

I heard Takeru already went to visit him

Let’s allow the kid to comfort the dad friend

**Aruto**

Hey, what happened to Tomari-san?

**Eiji**

Date told me his old partner, Hayase, passed away from a heart attack

He’s been really depressed ever since

**Aruto**

Oh, poor thing

**Haruto**

GUYS 

Guess what Shinnosuke’s wife just posted on her Instagram 

**Haruto**

(photo of Shinnosuke and Takeru sleeping against each other as little Eiji squirms in his dad’s lap)

**Wataru**

OMG

SO CUTE

**Kouta**

Dad’s with both his children

**Gentaro**

Kawaii kouhai kita!

**Shinnosuke**

WHAT THE HECK?!

**Tsukasa**

Oh, you’re awake, dad?

**Shinnosuke**

WHERE DID THIS PHOTO COME FROM?!

**Haruto**

Oh, your wife posted this on her social media and I reposted it here

I think it’s cute, Dad

**Shinnosuke**

STOP CALLING ME DAD!

**Takeru**

I’m okay with it, tou-san

**Shinnosuke**

NOT YOU TOO, TAKERU!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Secretly, Shinnosuke felt proud on the inside. 


	31. Tsukasa Becomes A Trader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Riders deal with their photo books. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has 99 percent more crack. Enjoy! 

**Sento**

Tsukasa

I just found Shoutaro in a cataconic state 

When I asked him what was wrong he murmured something about “photobooks and Decade”

Care to explain?

**Tsukasa**

Oh, that

I needed a favor from Philip so I got him a photobook of Shoutaro’s actor from another world

He must’ve discovered what was inside it

**Wataru**

And what would be inside it that would drive Shoutaro into a cataconic state?

**Tsukasa**

...A picture of him showing off his bare butt?

**Kenzaki**

...Oh

**Wataru**

I thought you would be above bribing, Decade

**Tsukasa**

I’m not

Anyway, anyone else want photobooks? 

I’ll do it for favors!

**Sento**

...I’ll have a copy of the photobook of my husband’s actor

**Sougo**

I’ll take a copy of Geiz’s photobook!

**Kenzaki**

Can I have a copy of Hajime’s photobook, please?

**Ryotaro**

...You’re evil, Tsukasa

**Tsukasa**

I thought you would know that already by now “ψ(｀∇´)ψ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa became rich later and Ryuuga was soon found in a cataconic state as well. 


	32. Takeru Is Reckless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever wonder what it felt like to be dead?
> 
> Takeru sure has.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A request by GNR2012. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Wait

Some of you actually died, senpai?

**Tsukasa**

Yep 

**Sougo**

What did it feel like, senpai?

Was there like, another side or something like that?

**Tsukasa**

Felt like it

I woke up in this weird limbo

Really surreal 

But that was a long time ago

If you want to ask about the other side, ask Takeru

He has the the most deaths among us

**Sougo**

Really?

How many?

**Takeru**

4 times

Or maybe 5?

I lost count

**Emu**

That reminds me

You ARE taking good care of yourself, right, Takeru-kun?

**Takeru**

Yes, Mom...

WAIT

OMG I DIDN’T MEAN TO SAY THAT!

**Tsukasa**

No escaping it now, Hojo!

**Emu**

WOULD YOU GUYS CUT THIS OUT?!

**Sougo**

Since when was Emu-senpai really overprotective of Takeru-san?

**Tsukasa**

He always has been since they first met

You should’ve seen the lecture Mom and Dad gave Takeru after that Pac-Man incident

He’s pretty much the baby of the Riders

And you’re the little brother, Sougo

**Sougo**

Hey!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sougo would receive the same lecture a few days later after he had a near death experience. 


	33. Kouta Gets Criticized

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do Riders have fashion sense? 
> 
> That depends on the Rider.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entry contains photos and more crack. Enjoy!

**Sento**

Hey, Eiji-kun

Your Hina friend’s a fashion designer, right?

**Eiji**

Yes?

What’s this about?

**Sento**

I have a friend who needs a total makeover

He has the worst fashion sense ever

**Eiji**

How bad are we talking about?

**Sento**

**Shoutaro**

Wait a minute

Isn’t that the Prime Minister’s son?!

What is with his outfit?!

**Sento**

Unfortunately, he’s always been like that

Even in the old world

**Sougo**

That is way too much pink even for my taste

**Tsukasa**

Agree

And isn’t your fashion sense kind of questionable, Sento?

**Sento**

What do you mean by that, Tsukasa?!

How dare you question the fashion sense of a genius like me?!

**Shoutaro**

...Your ego is showing again.

**Tsukasa**

Has anyone ever noticed your mismatched shoes and scarf?

**Sougo**

Wow, you’re right

**Sento**

My outfit is very professional, thank you very much!

Unlike Emu’s here!

**Sento**

**Tsukasa**

Oh yeah

I forgot about him and his clashing colors

**Haruto**

He’s a gamer

He probably doesn’t care about what he wears

**Kenzaki**

Do you even do your laundry, kid?

**Emu**

Can you not get on my case around here?!

If anything, the one with questionable professional style is Aruto-kun!

**Emu**

**Shinnosuke**

Is that a hoodie?

Are you kidding me, Hiden-san?!

**Sento**

This is not fitting for a CEO…

**Sougo**

That doesn’t look very professional...

**Aruto**

Hey!

A lot of CEOs wear what they want, so why not me?

And no offense, Sougo-kun, but don’t your clothes ever fit?

**Aruto**

**Sento**

Wow, you’re right

**Tsukasa**

Kid, you look like a pastel colored nightmare

**Takumi**

Are you sure this guy is supposed to be a king in the future?

**Sougo**

...I concede the fact

But you have to admit, I do have a good hairstyle 

Unlike how Tsukasa-senpai did once

**Sougo**

**Emu**

Wow

**Kouta**

That’s just awful, buddy

**Wataru**

A terrible person with terrible hair styles

**Tsukasa**

Really, kid, really?!

And where did you even get that photo from?!

**Sougo**

...Your sort of boyfriend?

**Tsukasa**

I’m gonna kill Kaito later

Well, at least I didn’t go around with a mullet!

**Tsukasa**

**Kouta**

WTF DECADE

**Shinnosuke**

OMG

**Emu**

That has been out of style since forever

**Haruto**

Really, Kouta?

Couldn’t you magic yourself a better hairstyle?

**Tsukasa**

And have you ever seen his old God outfit?

**Tsukasa**

**Wataru**

...Why?

**Emu**

Sweet mother of…

You look like a rejected fantasy RPG character, Kouta!

**Sougo**

This is worse than your current one

**Kenzaki**

Not that it was better anyway

**Sento**

Fruit Jesus: overcompensation to the ninth degree

**Kouta**

DO YOU WANT ME TO SMITE YOU ALL?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Kouta was declared the least fashionable of them all and he now had another reason to kill Decade. 


	34. Takeru Gives Puppy Dog Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, a prank on Tsukasa backfires horribly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A request by GNR2012. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

This is Kaito

Now, which of you morons fed my boyfriend sea cucumbers and got him sent to the hospital from an allergic reaction?!

**Sougo**

..He’s allergic?

**Tsukasa**

He never told anyone out of pride

Now, who did it?!

**Sougo**

It was Takeru-kun, Haruto-san, Hitoshi-san, and Wataru-kun!

**Haruto**

SELL-OUT!

**Emu**

Are you guys idiots?!

Do you have any idea things could’ve gotten worse?!

**Shinnosuke**

We are very disappointed in you four!

Especially you, Takeru-kun!

**Takeru**

(photo of Takeru giving the biggest puppy dog eyes ever, looking like he’s about to cry)

**Takeru**

I am so sorry, senpai! I had no idea this would happen! ( ͒˃̩̩⌂˂̩̩ ͒)

**Shinnosuke**

...It’s okay, Takeru-kun. I understand

**Emu**

Me too

The rest of you… should’ve known better

**Haruto**

SERIOUSLY, WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS PLAYING FAVORITES WITH THE GHOST KID?!

**Sento**

...Because he’s not as bad as you, Haruto?

**Haruto**

SHUT UP, SENTO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The pranksters were forced to apologize, all heavily bruised (with the exception of Takeru).


	35. Philip Gets Jealous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember Jimmy, that terrible musician back in Kamen Rider W? 
> 
> He’s back, and still breaking people’s eardrums.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A request from Dancingqueenisgood!443. Takes place on the Narumi Agency Chat. Enjoy!

**Philip**

Shoutaro

You remember Jimmy, that musician back from when we were fighting the Liar Dopant?

**Shoutaro**

...Don’t tell me he’s playing his music again

**Ryuuga**

He is

And he’s got the worst voice I’ve ever hear

**Ryuuga**

(photo of Jimmy performing as everyone around him had their ears covered)

**Shoutaro**

...Just, why?

**Philip**

Apparently he had a fight with his girlfriend and decided to best way to get her back was to “serenade” her with the thing that made her love him in the first place

**Shoutaro**

...Ugh

**Philip**

Speaking of Jimmy…

**Philip**

[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEYvYV_8omY ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEYvYV_8omY)

**Shoutaro**

WTF 

Where did you get that video?!

**Philip**

Tsukasa sent me this earlier and thought I should see this

**Shoutaro**

...Onore, Diceido...

Philip, this took place before we got together

And it’s entirely out of context

**Philip**

That’s doesn’t mean I have to be fine with it

Why can’t you chase after me like that in a romantic way?

**Shoutaro**

...Do I have to do that to you?

**Philip**

Yes

**Shoutaro**

Fine

**Ryuuga**

...Whipped

**Shoutaro**

I’M STILL HERE, YOU KNOW!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ryuuga wasn’t surprised that Philip was that petty.


	36. Gou Discovers Everyone Knows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In another entry of the Narumi Agency Chat, Gou realizes he’s not as subtle as he thinks. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is dedicated to all fans of Drive. Enjoy!

**Gou**

Guys

What did you want to tell me about?

**Philip**

Tsukasa gave us this audio CD 

And it contains this entire dream sequence you had with Hypnos

**Gou**

THERE’S AN AUDIO CD OF THAT?!

**Ryuuga**

Yep, and it’s the most hilarious thing I ever listened to

**Philip**

I know a couple of places to visit the dates you wanted to have!

**Ankh**

Man, you had it bad for that robot 

****

**Gou**

...

**Sento**

Guys, I think we broke him

**Chase**

If it helps, Gou, I also find you cute

**Shoutaro**

I don’t think that really helps, Chase

**Gou**

...I need a moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gou then proceeded to scream into the nearest pillow for the next hour.


	37. Gentaro Is A Cuddle Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa is turned into a cat and everyone around him likes making him suffer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by CerasusAliel. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Haruto

Have you apologized to Decade’s friends?

**Haruto**

Yes

**Kenzaki**

Okay, what did the magic kid do now?

**Shoutaro**

This

**Shoutaro**

(photo of a kitten with brown fur and an all too familiar magenta camera on their neck)

**Wataru**

...Great, now we have a demon kitty 

**Shoutaro**

The worst part is that Daiki took his clothes so I’m pretty sure Tsukasa will be naked when the spell wears off

**Philip**

You should’ve seen him when he first transformed

**Philip**

(photo of Kitty Tsukasa attacking Haruto, leaving scratches on his arm)

**Kouta**

Ow

That’s had to hurt

**Haruto**

Tell me about it

But it is kind of entertaining 

Gentaro was there when he transformed and this happened

**Haruto**

(photo of Gentaro cuddling a struggling Kitty Tsukasa with the KRC in the background)

**Wataru**

I’M ROLLING ON THE FLOOR

**Emu**

I AM DYING OVER HERE

**Kouta**

Guess even the Destroyer of Worlds can’t withstand the Friendship Monster 。+゜(*´>艸<｀*)。+゜

**Shinnosuke**

Um, Gentaro

I don’t think Kadoya is breathing

**Kouta**

And I’m pretty sure your boyfriend doesn’t like you cuddling Tsukasa like that

**Gentaro**

Does that mean I have to cuddle both of them?

**Emu**

That’s not what he meant (；￣Д￣)

**Hitoshi**

You do realize Kadoya will kill you when he realizes you took photos, right?

**Haruto**

Worth it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Tsukasa turned back to normal, he was nude and Haruto proceeded to take blackmail photos.


	38. Haruto Starts A Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Sento is also a little shit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Ginga2Sam. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Philip

Why is the office on fire?!

**Philip**

I didn’t cause it this time, I swear!

Haruto did!

**Haruto**

Sorry

**Shoutaro**

WHAT THE HELL, SOUMA?!

WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO YOU?!

**Haruto**

IT’S NOT WHAT YOU DID, IT’S WHAT BUILD DID!

**Shoutaro**

Sento

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!

**Sento**

...I tricked Haruto into eating a jelly filled sugar donut?

**Shoutaro**

...That is not worth attacking Sento over, Haruto!

**Haruto**

YES IT IS

HE MADE ME BETRAY MY PLAIN SUGAR!

**Sento**

In my defense, I had no idea he would react this strongly!

**Philip**

Um, can anyone lend us a hand?

Things are escalating

**Philip**

(photo of Haruto chasing Sento as he starts causing fires everywhere)

**Shoutaro**

You do realize that’s destruction of public property?

**Haruto**

I DON’T CARE!

I WON’T REST UNTIL I HAVE VENGEANCE!

**Shoutaro**

UGH

I AM SO DONE WITH YOU GUYS

**Philip**

I’ll call Rinko-san and have Akiko get her slipper ready, aibou 

**Shinnosuke**

And I’ll come with Emu-san in case things escalate more

**Eiji**

Wow, I feel bad for Shoutaro having to deal with this all the time

**Sougo**

Well, Haruto-san is as petty as Tsukasa-senpai

**Tsukasa**

WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Haruto was chewed out by both Akiko and Rinko who both had weapons ready.


	39. Natsumi Is Done

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Personality swap, Rider style.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Misora. This takes place on the Rider Girls chat. Enjoy!

**Misora**

Rinko-san

When will the personality swap spell on our boys wear off?

**Rinko**

Shunpei said it should wear off in an hour or so

**Misora**

One hour?!

I don’t think I can handle this much longer

**Tsukuyomi**

Something wrong, Misora?

**Misora**

I basically have to deal with three idiots now and it’s driving me insane 

**Poppy**

Know how you feel

Emu-kun is about as grumpy as Hiiro-san now

**Yua**

Having a non-pun making Hiden is so… weird

**Hina**

Eiji is basically the same as Ankh now

**Natsumi**

I think having a behaved Tsukasa is fine

**Yuuki**

About that, Natsumi-san...

Gen-chan…

Well...

**Yuuki**

(photo of Gentaro punching Tsukasa in the face)

**Natsumi**

...I don’t know whether to laugh or feel bad for Tsukasa

**Yuuki**

Natsumi-san!

Gen-chan will be devastated to learn what happened o(TヘTo)

**Natsumi**

Why aren’t the boys stopping the fight, though?

**Tomoko**

...Daiki was busy taping the whole thing and Ryusei-kun was too shocked to realize what was happening 

**Natsumi**

I’ll be sure to Pressure Point him later, then

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When everyone was back to normal, Gentaro was shown the photo and he made a tearful apology to a very confused Tsukasa.


	40. Haruto Reveals Too Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AKA Riders try to figure how to distinguish themselves from their doppelgangers. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request from Tantan15. Kind of short. Enjoy!

**Shinnosuke**

So what you’re saying, Kenzaki

Is that we should have some kind of code word in case we run into imposters again?

**Kenzaki**

Yeah, something like that

Say something only we should really know

**Kouta**

Like how I accidentally introduced myself as a space god the first time I met Shinnosuke?

**Sento**

Or what I did in front of Shoutaro when I first got together with Ryuuga?

**Haruto**

Or how Takeru is bicurious?

**Shinnosuke**

...What?

**Takeru**

HARUTO-SAN

I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYONE ABOUT THAT

**Shinnosuke**

Takeru-kun 

What is Haruto talking about?

**Takeru**

...My first thought when I saw Makoto-nii-san was that he really looked good in leather

And things downspiraled from there

**Shinnosuke**

...Can’t blame you on that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you’re wondering, Makoto is completely unaware of Takeru’s crush and remains (thankfully) oblivious to this day.


	41. Daiki Gets Payback For Tsukasa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, part two of the sea cucumber incident.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018 as a continuation of chapter 34. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Tsukasa-senpai

We need to talk about your not-boyfriend, Kaito

**Tsukasa**

What did he do this time?

**Sougo**

He’s taking payback for the sea cucumber incident

And it’s not pretty 

**Tsukasa**

What kind of payback?

**Takeru**

He told Akari about my bad grades!

**Wataru**

He replaced all my violins with out of tune ones!

**Hitoshi**

He stole all my training gears!

**Haruto**

And I haven’t been able to buy a plain sugar donut for a week!

**Tsukasa**

That bad, huh?

**Hitoshi**

Affirmative

**Tsukasa**

I’ll sic Natsumi on him, then

**Wataru**

Thank you!

**Sougo**

Hey, Tsukasa-san

If Kaito-san’s not your boyfriend

What is he to you anyway?

**Tsukasa**

...Some kind of yandere stalker I guess?

Kind of like that guy in the scarf that always follows you around

**Sougo**

H-Hey! 

Woz is not like that!

**Tsukasa**

...Has the guy ever watched you sleep?

**Sougo**

...Point taken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sougo discussed this with his time travelers, and they both agreed that Woz probably is a stalker.


	42. Hikawa Makes Aruto Cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another spell gone wrong has some Secondary Riders swap bodies for the day.
> 
> This is the aftermath of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original chat on the Riders B chatroom, now with more crack. Enjoy!

**Nitoh**

Well that was one very… eventful day

**Ryuuga**

I agree with you on that

**Hikawa**

I am SO killing Souma when I see him

**Yuuto**

Not if I get to him first!

**Kaoru**

Whoa, whoa, whoa

What’s with the death threats?

**Keisuke**

Did we… miss something?

**Nitoh**

Haruto did another one of his spell flubs and made some of the others switch bodies

There was Yuuto with Kagami, Hikawa with Fuwa, Date with Hiiro, Fukami with Terui, and Banjou with Akiyama

**Sakuya**

Wow

**Daiki**

That must’ve sucked

**Iori**

Was there… trouble?

**Hikawa**

YOU BET THERE WAS!

SHOUICHI TOLD ME I HAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT HIS PUNS ALL DAY SO NOW HE HAS BEEN TELLING ME THEM NON STOP!

WHAT THE HELL IS WITH YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR, FUWA?!

**Isamu**

YOU SHOULD GET ONE, HIKAWA!

MY BOYFRIEND HAS BEEN CRYING BECAUSE I SUPPOSEDLY HAVEN’T LAUGHED AT HIS JOKES!

HE’S IN LOVE WITH MY LAUGH! 

THAT’S WHAT MAKES HIM HAPPY!

**Gou**

...Am I glad I wasn’t affected by this

**Geiz**

Me too

So, how was everyone else’s day?

**Date**

Your co-workers are really nice, Hiiro-san!

I had a great time with them playing video games together

I even took a selfie with that Kiriya in a hawaiin shirt!

**Hiiro**

YOU DID WHAT?!

No wonder he was looking at me weird and Hojo told me that my gaming skills had suddenly got better

Well, at least I got to eat those cakes Kougami made for me when I was in your body

Although I don’t know how you can stand being around Hino without losing your mind

**Shintaro**

You just get used to it, Hiiro-san 

We learned to deal with them years ago

**Fukami**

I had a very uncomfortable day in your body, Terui-san

Truth is, I am asexual and your wife was trying to kiss me all day

Plus she eats as much takoyaki as Alain does

**Ryu**

That would explain why she was pouting at me when I turned back to normal

At least your sister was much more understanding and gave me some space

And kept your Alain friend away from me as I tried to get my bearings

**Yuuto**

Arata, why are you dating Tendou again?

I couldn’t stand being in the same room as him with that stupid ego and his freaking grandma quotes!

**Kagami**

Hey, he has his good points!

At least your Deneb friend was very nice to me

And he makes great food almost as much as my boyfriend!

Couldn’t stop myself from eating all of it

**Yuuto**

So that’s why he said I have been eating shiitake...

**Ryuuga**

It was fine being in your body, Akiyama-san

That Shinji guy wasn’t so bad

Even practiced a few of my moves with him

But do you know why Sento is currently not talking with me?

**Ren**

Your husband was trying to have sex with me all day and I had to refuse him everytime!

Are you two really that horny?!

And why the fuck is your body covered in so many hickeys?!

**Ryuuga**

...I like it rough with my husband?

**Ryusei**

TMI YOU TWO

TMI!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And for those wondering, Haruto was hiding at Shinnouske’s place who merely shook his head in disappointment.


	43. Shoutaro Gets A Black Eye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Shoutaro tries to keep the peace and fails horribly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I’m looking through all my old asks on asknarashikari for inspiration. Enjoy!

**Sento**

Philip

Why is there this video of Shoutaro getting into a fight with Akiko and some other guy online?

I’m assuming something happened while you were in Osaka?

**Shoutaro**

Damnit

I was hoping no one was filming that

**Haruto**

I have got to hear this story

**Philip**

So we were in Osaka at that nice takoyaki place Akiko wanted to visit

But there was only one piece left

And we were about to buy it when one of Takeru’s friends cut in line to get it himself

**Sougo**

What was that friend doing there anyway?

**Takeru**

Alain’s takoyaki maker broke and we were getting a new one when we went past the stall 

He was hungry and wanted some right at that moment

**Kouta**

And let me guess

A fight ensued

**Takeru**

Yes

Kanon and Terui-san tried to stop them from fighting but were failing

Akiko-san also slippered me, Philip-san, and Makoto-nii-san when we tried to help

**Sento**

Ouch 

That had to hurt

**Philip**

Meanwhile, Shoutaro is watching the whole thing when he suddenly screams and decides the best way to resolve the conflict is to eat the last takoyaki 

**Shinji**

That’s not one of your brightest ideas, Hidari 

**Shoutaro**

Would you stop getting on my case?!

**Takeru**

Then Alain and Akiko stared at him for a minute or so before they attacked Shoutaro-san instead and stormed off

**Philip**

And they left him with this

**Philip**

(photo of Shoutaro with a nasty black eye on the left side of his face)

**Tsukasa**

...Wow, not only are you half boiled you’re also an idiot

**Shoutaro**

STOP CALLING ME HALF BOILED!

**Sento**

We really need to do something about Akiko’s appetite… 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As for Alain and Akiko, they were in a corner sobbing about their lost food.


	44. Haruto Gets A Visit From An Angry Mob

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In part 2 of the body swap incident, Haruto explains everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2012 as a follow up to chapter 42. Enjoy!

**Haruto**

So, guys

I may have cast a new spell

That caused some of your secondaries to switch bodies

Which is why they might have been acting strange lately

**Takeru**

Eh?!

**Ryotaro**

You did what?!

**Shouichi**

...So Makoto doesn’t find me funny after all?

**Haruto**

Sorry, Shouichi, he doesn’t

**Shouichi**

Why you have to dash my hopes like that... (´;︵;`)

**Aruto**

So that’s why Isamu hasn’t been laughing at my jokes 

**Tendou**

And why Kagami has been leaving the room the moment I start to say something

**Shinji**

And why Ren has been acting real nice lately

**Philip**

And why Terui has been avoiding Akiko

**Eiji**

And why Date has been acting a bit grumpy

**Emu**

And why Hiiro has suddenly gotten some gaming skills

**Sento**

And why my Ryuuga has been refusing my sexual advances!

**Shoutaro**

I didn’t need to hear that last part!

**Aruto**

What the hell, Haruto-san?!

For a moment I thought my boyfriend didn’t love me anymore!

**Sento**

I thought the same with my husband!

Why are you always testing your new spells on us?!

**Haruto**

Because I’m not stupid enough to test them on myself?

**Shinnosuke**

What kind of answer is that?!

Listen, if anyone wants to talk to him, he’s hiding at my place

**Haruto**

WTF SHINNOSUKE

**Shinnosuke**

Consider this your punishment

**Haruto**

TRAITOR

**Sento**

I CALL DIBS ON KILLING HIM!

**Aruto**

NOT IF ME AND MY BOYFRIEND GET TO HIM FIRST!

**Tsukasa**

Who wants to watch the massacre with me?

**Kouta**

I do!

**Takumi**

I’ll bring snacks for anyone who needs them!

**Philip**

And I’ll keep count of any betting pools

**Shinnosuke**

….5000 yen that Sento will kill Haruto first

**Haruto**

I HATE YOU ALL!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After his beating, Haruto noted to himself to test new spells on Nitou instead.


	45. Tsukasa Gets Embarrassed For Once

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look at some of the Phase 1 couples through Tsukasa’s eyes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

I’m just saying

My predecessors are more gayer than all of us

**Shoutaro**

And what proof do you have of that?

**Tsukasa**

Just look at Godai and his boyfriend 

**Tsukasa**

**Tsukasa**

And this happened after the two JUST met

**Yusuke**

...I concede to that point

**Tsukasa**

Then we have this about Kenzaki and Aikawa...

**Tsukasa**

**Kenzaki**

T-THERE’S A RING OF US?!

**Emu**

So you two are a couple after all!

**Kouta**

It’s official guys!

**Kenzaki**

ARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!

**Haruto**

I think we broke him, guys

**Tsukasa**

Heh

**Sougo**

Wait a minute, everyone

Look what I discovered

**Sougo**

**Tsukasa**

EH?!

**Shinnosuke**

Are you SURE Daiki’s not your boyfriend, Kadoya?

**Sento**

You two aren’t exactly subtle…

**Tsukasa**

...I need a moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In two very different locations, Tsukasa and Kenzaki were screaming.


	46. Kouta Gets Scared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What would a space god be scared of?
> 
> One angry boyfriend might do the trick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by CerasusAliel. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

Hey does anyone know why Kazuraba looked spooked the last time I visited him?

**Gentaro**

Oh, that

Must’ve been still spooked

**Sougo**

Spooked?

What the heck happened?

**Gentaro**

...Kouta kind of turned me into a beagle and Kengo gave him an hour long lecture that scared the heck out of him?

**Haruto**

...the literal space god got spooked by your boyfriend?

**Gentaro**

Yes?

**Kouta**

I was not that spooked!

**Tsukasa**

Oh, he’s coherent 

**Haruto**

Seriously, Kouta

How could you be scared of that guy?

You could probably beat that guy

**Kouta**

He threatened to tell my sister along with Mai and Micchy!

I’m scared of them!

Besides, I’m not the only one scared of my boyfriend and girlfriend!

Just look at Shinnosuke!

**Shinnosuke**

Don’t drag me into this!

**Tsukasa**

Oh yeah I forgot about Mr. Officer and his wife

Don’t you like being scared of her, though?

**Haruto**

You’re right, Tsukasa

He probably has a thing for being manhandled

**Kouta**

Agreed 

**Shinnosuke**

I’M PLACING YOU ALL UNDER ARREST FOR POLICE HARASSMENT!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Later, Shinnosuke posted a picture of his harassers in handcuffs on the chat, proving you can arrest a space god.


	47. Daiki Is Not Subtle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Daiki likes to make out with his not-boyfriend a lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018 as a follow up to chapter 45. Enjoy!

**Ryu**

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU DAIKI KAITO 

**Kaito**

Look, I said I was sorry

Can’t you forgive me?

**Ryu**

I have my hands filled with one horny couple in the form of Ryuuga and Sento

So please, watch where you’re making out!

**Nitoh**

Whoa

What happened?

**Ryu**

Daiki was making out with Kadoya on Shoutaro’s desk

**Isamu**

Really, Daiki?!

Wasn’t making out on my boyfriend’s desk enough for you?!

**Yuuto**

Well, they are basically like two horny kids?

They already made out on the Den-Liner once

**Kagami**

And in my office

**Hikawa**

And at Shouichi’s restaurant 

**Keisuke**

And in Wataru’s house

**Gou**

And in one of the SIU’s closets

**Date**

And at the Kougami Foundation 

**Shintaro**

And in the kitchen at Cafe Coussier

**Fukami**

And in a backroom at the temple

**Ryusei**

And in the Rabbit Hutch

**Hiiro**

And in a patient room at the hospital

**Geiz**

And on my boyfriend’s bed!

**Isamu**

Wow

What are you to gain from all of this, Daiki?

**Kaito**

I’m trying to make Tsukasa see me as more than a “friend with benefits” so to speak

So I’ll be forcing him into more make outs so to speak

**Tachibana**

And I thought Kenzaki and Aikawa had bad UST...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, Tsukasa is currently being lectured by a very furious Shoutaro.


	48. Haruto Fights Some Vines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haruto and weed (and not the kind you think).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Ginga2Sam. Enjoy!

**Haruto**

KOUTA

**Kouta**

What?

**Haruto**

Take a look

**Haruto**

(photo of the Donut Shop Hungry covered in vines)

**Kouta**

Aren’t those… Helheim plants?!

**Haruto**

Nitoh found one of those Invees plants and decided to make it grow without telling anyone

Now it’s growing everywhere

Can’t you come along and do plant control or something?!

**Kouta**

...I’m on it

* * *

**Tsukasa**

So, how was plant control today?

**Haruto**

Exhausting… 

**Kouta**

Seriously, what was your friend thinking about dealing with those things? 

Well, at least the owner gave me some nice donuts as thanks

But what’s with the ones with mayo?

**Haruto**

Blame Nitoh

**Tsukasa**

Hey, did you know Haruto almost married the donut shop owner once?

**Haruto**

I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYBODY ABOUT THAT!

**Kouta**

....Should I ask?

**Gentaro**

Let’s just say she looked a lot younger when he met her back then

Or was it a he?

Can’t tell

**Sougo**

I thought you were asexual, senpai…

**Sento**

Never thought you’d go for that, Souma!

**Shinnosuke**

If it helps, I am fully supportive of your choices

**Haruto**

ONORE DICKEIDO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Nitoh had all mayonnaise confiscated from him for a week as punishment while Haruto chased Tsukasa in his Infinity form.


	49. Tsukasa Meets His Doppelganger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AKA the Garo crossover we didn’t ask for but are getting anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Noice. This chapter also contains Toku cameos and actor references. Enjoy!

**Haruto**

Tsukasa

About the ring you gave me that your not boyfriend stole…

It’s talking to me

Literally

**Tsukasa**

Wait 

A ring talked back to you?

**Haruto**

Yes

And it gave me his owner’s name

Can you ask your not boyfriend which dimension he got it from and bring him to me?

The ring says he’s needed to fight evil and stuff like that

**Tsukasa**

On it

* * *

**Haruto**

GUYS

THIS IS BAD

**Shinnosuke**

What kind of bad?

**Haruto**

So Tsukasa brought the ring’s owner to me

His name was Dougai

But when Dougai came, this other guy followed him

AND HERE’S WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE

**Haruto**

(photo of Dougai fighting someone with silver hair and one very familiar face) 

**Sougo**

Is that...

**Shinji**

OMG THERE’S TWO TSUKASAS?!

**Kenzaki**

WTF?!

**Kouta**

I AM DONE

ONE WAS BAD ENOUGH

I AM NOT DEALING WITH TWO OF THEM!

**Tsukasa**

Am I really that bad to deal with?

**Eiji**

YES!

**Sougo**

...A little?

**Tsukasa**

I appreciate the honesty, kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Jinga was wondering if he had a twin as Dougai Ryuuga continued to cross blades with him. 


	50. Gentaro Sulks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On another group chat, two people eloped without everyone else’s knowledge and the crew is not happy about it at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the group chat for the original KRC, everyone. Enjoy! 

**Yuuki**

Ryusei-kun! Tomoko-chan!

How could you get married without telling us?!

**JK**

And how come that tabloid found out before I did?!

I’m legit, guys!

**Ryusei**

Everyone I can explain

But right now, we’re currently having trouble!

**Ryusei**

(photo of a crowd filled with dozens of paparazzi)

**Tomoko**

They’ve been outside our apartment ever since the news came out

**Kengo**

Oh right

I forgot Tomoko’s a famous author, so she probably has paparazzi waiting for them

**Shun**

If it helps, we can come down there with Gentaro as soon as we can cheer him up

**Tomoko**

What do you mean by that?

**Yuuki**

I understand what you did, but it doesn’t mean I’m happy about it!

Look what Gen-chan did when he heard the news!

**Yuuki**

(photo of Fourze sitting on the moon, clearly sulking)

**Miu**

He’s been like that for an hour

**Tomoko**

...Oh dear

**Ryusei**

I feel like I just kicked a puppy…

**Yuuki**

You should! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ryusei felt so guilty about this that he promised Gentaro he would be the godfather of Tomoko’s first child.


	51. Sento Destroys A Wall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What a (mostly) normal day in the Narumi Agency Group Chat looks like. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by All-Nighter-with-work. Enjoy!

**Akiko**

Guys!

What happened to the back wall of the garage?!

I didn’t hear anything about this!

**Philip**

Don’t worry Akiko 

Shoutaro is busy being mad at Sento

**Akiko**

So it was him this time?!

What happened?!

**Philip**

He wanted to fully demonstrate the abilities of the Genius Fullbottle

And decided using Rocket was the best choice

**Akiko**

I can’t even with you two

**Shoutaro**

Sorry about that, Akiko

Sento has learned his lesson

**Philip**

You’re done lecturing him already, Shoutaro?

**Shoutaro**

He’s in a corner right now reflecting on his actions

**Ryuuga**

I am so sorry about him 

**Sento**

(photo of Sento pouting with puppy dog eyes)

**Sento**

Please forgive me, Ryuuga!

**Ryuuga**

We’ve been over this

That doesn’t work on me

**Sento**

.·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.

**Shoutaro**

Why do you let your husband do these explosive experiments anyway?

**Sento**

My husband is perfectly fine in letting me do these experiments

Especially on him!

**Ryuuga**

I told you not to tell anyone about that, babe!

**Shoutaro**

You do what?

Are you some kind of masochist or something, Ryuuga?

**Ryuuga**

….

**Shoutaro**

...Sweet mother of Gaim, you are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sento can confirm that his husband is a masochist, especially if it comes to the bedroom.


	52. Tsukasa Gets Unwanted Attention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, baby pictures galore! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by Lumino/Sarah. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

So, kid

What do you think about my sister?

**Wataru**

Wait, wait, wait

You have a sister? 

**Tsukasa**

Yes? 

And she was just visiting Sougo, so I am asking him how did it go

**Sougo**

She was real nice

She also gave me this!

**Sougo**

(photo of a tiny baby boy in pink clothes)

**Tsukasa**

S-SHE GAVE YOU MY BABY PICTURES?!   
  


**Sougo**

Yep!

**Shinji**

Holy Gaim!

He liked pink even as a child!

**Tsukasa**

IT’S MAGENTA GODDAMNIT!

MAGENTA!

**Sougo**

And that’s not even the only one she gave me

**Sougo**

(photo of baby Tsukasa wearing a cat onesie)

**Takeru**

Awwwwwww….

**Kenzaki**

I can’t believe this sweet kid grew up into a nightmare

**Gentaro**

Cute senpai kita!

**Tsukasa**

Will you stop embarrassing me, kid?!

**Sougo**

But Sayo-chan said I should post them!

**Tsukasa**

No more pictures!

I’m gonna kill her later...

**Shoutaro**

Nice onesie, Kadoya 

Real intimidating...

**Tsukasa**

Why, you...

Well, two can play at that game, Hidari!

**Tsukasa**

(photo of a tiny baby taking a bath)

**Shoutaro**

HOW IN THE NAME OF GAIM DID YOU GET THAT?!

**Tsukasa**

Akiko found them when she was cleaning the agency one day and gave it to me for blackmail purposes

**Philip**

I’ll have to thank her later for the pictures of my cute husband <3

**Sento**

Well, there goes your dignity, Shoutaro

**Tsukasa**

I thought he didn’t have any in the first place

**Shoutaro**

ONORE DICKEIDO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro later chased Akiko in the office wearing one of his meme faces before hunting down Tsukasa. 


	53. Sento Loses His Dignity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aka part 2 of Tsukasa brings embarrassing photos to the group chat, now with videos!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by GNR2018 as a sequel to chapter 19. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

You telling me you had a crush on Sento when you first met him, kid?

**Sougo**

Well, yeah

He saved my life kinda?

And he was… kind of handsome?

**Sento**

I don’t mind, Sougo-kun

I mean, who wouldn’t fall for me? 

**Shoutaro**

Your ego is showing again, Sento

And personally, Sougo, I think you have poor taste

**Sento**

And what is that supposed to mean?!

**Tsukasa**

Oh yeah, I agree with you, Hidari

Look at the stuff I found about Kiryuu

**Tsukasa**

**Tsukasa**

[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WL2lshqpHE ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WL2lshqpHE)

**Tsukasa**

[ https://kurokoma-saki.tumblr.com/post/184919122955/no-ones-uploaded-this-scene-in-video-format-so ](https://kurokoma-saki.tumblr.com/post/184919122955/no-ones-uploaded-this-scene-in-video-format-so)

**Kouta**

You have hair boners, Sento?!

**Haruto**

I can’t believe you use your husband like that, Sento

**Shotuaro**

Or the fact that you went over to those puppies

**Sougo**

...You’re right about Sento-senpai, everyone

**Sento**

First of all, it’s not a hair boner

Second, my husband is willing to help in my experiments

And third, I’m pretty sure you would do the same thing with cats, Shoutaro!

**Philip**

...Now that I think about it, he did once

**Shoutaro**

Philip!

**Tsukasa**

Doesn’t change the fact you aren’t good taste

Just look at this scene with some of your predecessors 

**Tsukasa**

[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwV_3pDdh7Q ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwV_3pDdh7Q)

**Wataru**

...Wow

**Kenzaki**

Ladies and gentleman, the defenders of the universe

**Takumi**

What's with that catchphrase, Hino?!

**Haruto**

You guys are idiots, you know that? 

**Shinnosuke**

Can’t believe you got scolded like that, Kouta

**Sougo**

What were you guys all saying?

**Sento**

...Anybody want to help me kill Tsukasa later?

**Kouta**

I’m in!

**Emu**

Me too!

**Eiji**

Me three!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sure enough, Tsukasa got a visit at Hikari Photo Studio later consisting of four angry Riders and a homemade bazooka.


	54. Sougo Sympathizes With Shinnosuke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinnosuke hates anything that has to do with time travel. Sougo never understood why until now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by LuminoEverdark. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Ugh

I am so tired

**Shinnosuke**

What happened, Sougo-kun?

**Sougo**

I was just fighting off this leftover Timejacker and had to deal with the timeline falling apart again

And I nearly had my memory erased

Is this why you hate time travel stuff, Tomari-san?

**Shinnosuke**

...Pretty much

Why do you think I had to stop Sento from trying to make a time machine out of my car?

**Sougo**

For some reason I am not surprised he tried to do that

**Philip**

Oh that reminds me

Emu-san, could you head over to the Agency please? 

Sento tried to recreate Tomari’s Rider Kick and he had failed

Horribly

**Shoutaro**

He actually went through with it?

I told him it was probably a bad idea!

**Philip**

I tried to talk him out of it

But he kept insisting “it’s just physics and math stuff, I’ll be fine!”

**Emu**

I’ll head down there soon

**Sougo**

You know, for a genius, Sento-senpai can be such an idiot sometimes

**Shinnosuke**

It’s because of his ego, kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Sento was currently lying in his husband’s lap complaining about motion sickness.


	55. Sougo Goes Binge Watching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aka Sougo finds DVDs about his Rider Senpai. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by tapmeawakeinsomnia. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Senpai 

Look at what Tsukasa-senpai has

**Sougo**

(photo of piles of Kamen Rider DVDs)

**Sougo**

Apparently he get his info on us from that 

He stockpiled them from another dimension

**Shinnosuke**

Well, that explains how he knows so much about us

**Shoutaro**

Please tell me you confiscated them

**Sougo**

Yes

But I was curious and watched a little 

**Shinnosuke**

...How much?

**Sougo**

Just Shoutaro-senpai and Philip-senpai’s season for now

And I saw something really interesting though...

**Sougo**

**Sougo**

...Should I ask?

**Shoutaro**

...Please don’t

**Ryotaro**

I don’t even want to know

**Haruto**

He looks kind of cute, though

**Shinnosuke**

Wow

**Sento**

And I thought the outfit he wore during his K-Pop binge was ridiculous…

**Shoutaro**

That’s not even the most ridiculous thing he’s done 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro didn’t even want to get started on the time Philip researched ballet.


	56. Sento Gets Knocked Out Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or gender bender part 2, now with girls turning into guys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by GNR2018 as a sequel to chapter 5. Enjoy!

**Shinnosuke**

HARUTO SOUMA

WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT YOUR SPELL TESTING

**Haruto**

...You technically said not to do anything to the Riders? 

**Shinnosuke**

I TECHNICALLY HAVE A HUSBAND NOW!

**Haruto**

...I’ll tell Shunpei to be my test dummy then

**Gentaro**

Can this spell wear off sooner, though?

Miu has a big photo shoot coming up, and she can’t make it in her current state!

**Yusuke**

At least Sakurako is taking it fine?

She’s been really nice and understanding of the situation

**Shouichi**

Can’t say the same for me

Ozawa has been complaining about it all day

**Aruto**

Tell me about it

Isamu tried to calm down Yua and he got punched in the face instead

Apparently he said something about her not being feminine enough?

**Shoutaro**

Yowch

Know how you feel 

Akiko already slippered Ryuuga out cold for it

Probably still sensitive about last time

**Sougo**

What happened?

**Shoutaro**

The Agency had to act as decoys for a case once

And Philip was playing the girl being kidnapped instead of Akiko

She kind of have an existential crisis about it

**Sento**

Well, she wouldn’t exactly fit the criteria

She’s definitely not the kind of damsel you want to kidnap

Not to mention she’s lacking in the feminine department

I mean have you evpadsjioaasdj;kl

**Sougo**

Sento-senpai?

**Sento**

This is Akiko 

Sento is currently unconscious 

Now then

Shoutaro

Philip 

Do you have anything else to say about me?

**Shoutaro**

...Chief, you’re a precious member of the Agency and a really great person

**Philip**

You are very lady-like!

**Sento**

Thank you! <3

**Haruto**

...I’m doomed, aren’t I?

**Shoutaro**

Yep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nitoh posted a video online later of Haruto’s beatdown courtesy of Akiko.


	57. Tsukasa Gets Blamed Once Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daiki’s on a stealing spree again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by LuminoEverdark. Enjoy!

**Sento**

TSUKASA KADOYA

**Tsukasa**

I didn’t do anything this time, I swear!

**Sento**

Technically it is your fault, since what just happened wouldn’t have if you hadn’t known Daiki!

**Tsukasa**

What kind of logic is that?!

**Shinnosuke**

Our point is, we need to find Daiki and currently the Secondary Riders chat can’t seem to contact him

He’s been on a stealing spree again

**Tsukasa**

...What did he steal this time?

**Shoutaro**

The Gaia Memories

**Eiji**

And Team Birth’s Medals plus my Core Medals

**Gentaro**

And my Switches

**Haruto**

And my Magic Rings

**Kouta**

And the Lockseeds

**Shinnosuke**

And my Shift Cars plus Gou’s Signal Bikes

**Takeru**

And the Eyecons

**Emu**

And the Gashats 

**Sento**

And the Fullbottles

**Sougo**

And the Ridewatches

**Aruto**

And the Progerise Keys!

**Tsukasa**

...Wow, that’s a lot 

**Philip**

So are you going to control your boyfriend or not?

**Tsukasa**

He’s not my boyfriend!

**Shoutaro**

...Do you want me to sic Natsumi on you two?

**Tsukasa**

...Fine, I’ll get him to give your stuff back

**Sougo**

Wait, guys, I think I found him

**Sougo**

(photo of Daiki being chased by the Shift Cars, the Signal Bikes, and the fifteen Heroic spirits)

**Kouta**

...Wait, those are sentient?

**Shinnosuke**

Yep

**Takeru**

Uh huh!

**Haruto**

So, are we gonna save Daiki and take the stuff back now or watch him get punishment and get the stuff back later?

**Tsukasa**

I vote the latter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daiki tried to beg Tsukasa to stop his chasers, but he just merely laughed and watched the chase scene with popcorn in hand.


	58. The Taros Cause An Explosion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or another typical entry in the Imagin Group Chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by LordArtsyFics. This is my first time working with Den-O characters, so I apologize for any inaccuracies. Enjoy!

**Ryotaro**

Hello, everyone

**Momotaros**

Ryotaro, what are you doing on the chat?

**Ryotaro**

Owner gave me access to this Group Chat 

Now, can anyone please explain to me what happened to the Den-Liner?!

**Momotaros**

I was hoping you wouldn’t find out

For the record, it was Kozo's fault!

**Ryutaros**

No, it was your fault!

**Kintaros**

aihpfepnqewfxzasd

**Ryotaro**

..Did Kintaros fall asleep on his phone again?

**Momotaros**

Yep

**Ryotaro**

Urataros, can you explain to me what happened?

**Urataros**

It all started when Ryutaros tried to sneak another cat on board and we were arguing for him to take it back 

Suddenly the cat attacked Yuuto

We all tried to get him off

**Ryotaro**

And how did this lead to part of the Den-Liner exploding?

**Urataros**

Momotaros thought it would be a good idea to use our weapons to get the cat off

**Ryotaro**

Oh

**Ryutaros**

It was technically Momotaros’ fault since he immediately defaulted to violence!

**Momotaros**

No, it was your fault for bringing the damn cat in the first place!

**Ryotaro**

…It’s your fault

I’m cutting off your pudding privileges 

**Momotaros**

AW, COME ON!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Deneb was fussing over Yuuto who was covered in cat scratches.


	59. Takumi Says Something Out Of Context

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aruto attempts to bond with the Phase 1 Riders at Shouichi’s restaurant. 
> 
> Then alcohol gets added. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Phase 1 Riders tribute chat. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

So how was the party with my predecessors, Aruto?

**Aruto**

It was great!

I stayed away from the alcohol this time

Everyone else is probably dealing with hangovers though

**Haruto**

So… were there any drunk shenanigans?

**Aruto**

Lots

Tendou trying doing his speech on top of a table and nearly fell off it

Tsugami-san starting making flirty puns with his boyfriend and he was wailing in embarrassment

And Kido-san started clinging to people like a koala

Don’t even get me started on what Takumi-san did

**Kouta**

What did he do?

**Aruto**

Well, Takumi’s boyfriend Yuji started stripping in front of all of us 

So Takumi starts screaming at him to stop

When he says, and I quote, “I AM THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO SEE YOU NAKED!”

**Haruto**

...OMG ∗˚(* ˃̤൬˂̤ *)˚∗

**Shoutaro**

Doesn’t he realize how that sounds?!

**Aruto**

I know!

Pretty much everyone in the room stopped and started blushing, snickering, or facepalming about it

And Takumi turned brighter than a tomato as he processed what he just said 

Before Yuji just smiled and took Takumi away

**Haruto**

I’m presuming to a closet where they can bang

**Shoutaro**

Wow 

**Aruto**

This was my favorite part of the party, though

**Aruto**

(photo of Yua rider kicking Tsukasa in the crotch)

**Haruto**

SWEET MOTHER OF-

**Kouta**

I’M ROLLING ON THE FLOOR

**Sento**

KARMA HAS FINALLY STRUCK THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS!

**Shinnosuke**

...What brought this on

**Aruto**

Not sure

But nobody stopped her because we all decided he deserved it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Takumi would find out, much to his horror later, that someone recorded the whole thing and posted it on the internet.


	60. Haruto Makes A Deal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haruto tries to get back at Daiki and things backfire a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by AnkhsAngel. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

HARUTO SOUMA

WHY AM I STUCK TO KAITO?!

**Haruto**

So you got stuck to him, huh? 

**Shinnosuke**

What did you do this time, Souma?

**Haruto**

I tried to get back at Daiki for stealing our stuff

So I boobytrapped a ring I knew he would steal from me with a spell that would stick him to the nearest thing for a few hours

Guess that nearest thing was Pinkie over here

**Tsukasa**

FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM MAGENTA!

AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN A FEW HOURS?!

I CAN’T STAND BEING STUCK LIKE THIS!

**Haruto**

I think it’s nice punishment for you and your boyfriend

**Tsukasa**

HE’S NOT qpiwqeiondz

**Sougo**

Is Daiki-san making out with you again, Tsukasa-senpai?

**Tsukasa**

No, this is Natsumi

I just hit both of them with the Laughter Pressure Point 

And by the way, thank you, Haruto-san

I needed a good way to stop their bickering for a while

**Haruto**

No problem, I guess?

**Tsukasa**

Listen, if you want to do any more of your spell things on the boys, you are free to do so

They had it coming for a long time

**Haruto**

You have a deal!

**Aruto**

Senpai, are you gonna allow this? 

I mean, what has Kadoya-senpai ever done to you all?

**Shinji**

Yes, and Kadoya is usually the cause of some multiverse ending problem

**Wataru**

And he pulls pranks on us on a daily basis

**Kouta**

And he also got us involved in a few wars

**Sougo**

And he ate my dinner!

**Aruto**

...I’m not gonna ask about that last part

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haruto then asked Shunpei for some more dangerous rings to test on Tsukasa.


	61. Emu Owns Everyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phase 2 Riders go to a hot spring together. This was the result. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by one of my old asks. Enjoy!

**Aruto**

So how’s the hot spring trip, everyone?

**Shinnosuke**

...Could be better

**Takeru**

Well, we had four overheated people on hand

**Takeru**

(photo of Shinnosuke, Philip, Haruto, and Eiji dragging the unconscious forms of Kouta, Shoutaro, Gentaro, and Sougo respectively to bed)

**Shinji**

Whoa, what happened?

**Takeru**

Kouta-san, Hojo-sensei, Sougo-kun, Hidari-san, and Gentaro-kun were having a competition to see who could stay in the longest so they can prove they’re more cooler than the others

**Philip**

And Emu won

**Shinnosuke**

Seriously, why didn’t you stop these idiots, Hojo? 

**Emu**

Genius Gamer M never backs down from a challenge!

**Shinnosuke**

Don’t make me take away your game systems!

**Emu**

Try me, officer!

**Haruto**

Yeah, so that happened

**Eiji**

At least they’re not freaking out like Sento is right now

**Haruto**

Yeah, you’re right

Just look at him

**Haruto**

(photo of Sento with red skin) 

**Tsukasa**

Nice look, bunny boy (●´艸`)

**Sento**

It’s not funny!

I look like a cooked crustacean!

How can I go back like this?!

**Aruto**

Well, don’t feel crabby about that!

**Shouichi**

And you should’ve springed out of there sooner!

**Aruto**

Hai, Aruto and Shouichi janai to! 

**Sento**

...This is terrible

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once the four competitors were awake, they were subjected to a long lecture by Shinnosuke.


	62. Haruto Screams Like A Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ski trips, Rider style!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another story inspired by one of my old asks. Enjoy!

**Kenzaki**

Having fun at that ski resort, everyone? 

**Emu**

...It’s stressful

Especially since Takeru and Kouta keep yeeting themselves off the dangerous slopes

**Takeru**

What, I can’t have just a little fun?

**Emu**

I am concerned because you’re not a space god like Kouta-san

**Kouta**

Fair enough

Well, at least you’re not as ridiculous looking as Sougo is right now

**Kouta**

(photo of Gentaro and Sougo looking like marshmallows from how bundled up they are)

**Kenzaki**

...What the heck is with the clashing colors, Tokiwa? 

**Sougo**

Hey, don’t get on my case! I’m super warm!

Wish I had skills like Shoutaro, Eiji, or Philip though

**Gentaro**

How are all of them so good?

**Philip**

To be honest, I accidentally went to the advanced slope on the first time and I don’t know how I did it so well

**Eiji**

I kind of used to go to ski slopes all the time as a kid?

**Shoutaro**

And I had practice snowboarding

And I don’t scream like a girl like Haruto

**Takumi**

He does? 

**Haruto**

Oi!

That was because Sento pushed me down!

**Sento**

Well, you did it to me first!

**Haruto**

You were standing there too long and I wanted to ski down!

**Sento**

I was trying to figure out how to do a trick!

**Shinnosuke**

Will you two cut it out already?!

Don’t make me set Hunter on you!

**Haruto**

...Kay, Dad

**Sento**

Where are you anyway?

**Shinnosuke**

I’m on standby in the lodge with Emu in case anyone gets hurt 

Like Tsukasa already did

**Shinnosuke**

(photo of Tsukasa crashing into a tree)

**Shinji**

...Wow

**Ryotaro**

What an idiot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A video of Tsukasa’s crash soon came online and it was revealed he also screams like a girl.


	63. Shinnosuke Does Air Guitar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Riders listen to their Opening Themes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Green_Extreme_Ninjetti13. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Tsukasa-senpai, why did you have to introduce Woz to my opening theme?

He’s been playing it all the time and it’s starting to get stuck in my head…

**Tsukasa**

To be fair, I didn’t think he would do that

At least it’s catchy?

**Sougo**

I’ll give you that

**Shouichi**

If we’re all talking about our theme song, mine is the most catchy

**Takumi**

No, mine’s more catchy

**Souji**

I believe mine is the catchiest 

**Sento**

No, it’s mine!

**Shoutaro**

What about my theme?!

**Emu**

Will you guys all stop arguing?!

Everyone’s song is at least a little bit catchy!

**Sento**

Sorry, Mom

**Tsukasa**

Well, I know someone who thinks their theme song is really catchy

**Tsukasa**

(photo of Shinnosuke doing air guitar in the Tridoron)

**Haruto**

What a dork (≧艸≦*)

**Shinnosuke**

WTF

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT PHOTO, KADOYA?!   
  


**Tsukasa**

Oh, someone under the username of “MachSpeed” posted it on Instagram 

**Shinnosuke**

...I’m gonna go kill my brother in law

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinnosuke spent the rest of his day chasing after Gou with Justice Hunter.


	64. Emu Unleashes His Wrath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa tries to humiliate Emu, but he greatly underestimates Genius Gamer M. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea by tapemeawakeinsomnia. Enjoy!

**Tsukasa**

Hojo Emu

I have some many questions

**Emu**

About what? 

**Tsukasa**

This

**Tsukasa**

[ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0MSuouGT7Q ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0MSuouGT7Q)

**Haruto**

What the heck?!

**Takeru**

Hojo-sensei?

**Emu**

I lost a bet, okay?!

Where in the name of Gaim did you find that, Kadoya?!

**Tsukasa**

I have my sources (^_−)☆

**Emu**

…

**Sougo**

Senpai?

**Tsukasa**

Wait a minute

WTF

HOW DID YOU GET AHOLD OF THESE VIDEOS, HOJO?!

**Emu**

I have my ways

So, anything else you have on me, Decade?

**Tsukasa**

...None at all!

**Takumi**

Whoa

**Kenzaki**

Remember me never to make Mom mad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsukasa refused to disclose what was in the videos to this day.


	65. Eiji Realizes He's Obvious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Riders listen to their insert songs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Katiana. Enjoy!

**Kouta**

Tsukasa

Why is my insert song with Kaito so… filled with sexual tension? 

**Tsukasa**

Not my fault you two were so obvious

**Kouta**

I NEVER HAD A THING WITH HIM!

**Shoutaro**

What are you two talking about?

**Tsukasa**

Songs sung by our actors from that other world

Like the one you and your partner have

**Tsukasa**

[ https://soundcloud.com/trigger-zaid/finger-on-the-trigger-re-edit-ver ](https://soundcloud.com/trigger-zaid/finger-on-the-trigger-re-edit-ver)

**Shinji**

Wow 

You two are good

**Shoutaro**

Uh, thanks

**Sougo**

Tsukasa-san showed me some and they’re all good

My favorite is this one!

**Sougo**

[ https://soundcloud.com/hypersupershinkenred66/spinning-wheel ](https://soundcloud.com/hypersupershinkenred66/spinning-wheel)

**Kouta**

Whoa

**Haruto**

I had no idea you could sing like that, Dad

**Shinnosuke**

Will you guys stop calling me dad?!

But yeah, I can sing

**Tsukasa**

This is my favorite song, though

**Tsukasa**

[ https://soundcloud.com/walther-iv-n-medina-soto/kamen-rider-ooo-time-judged-all ](https://soundcloud.com/walther-iv-n-medina-soto/kamen-rider-ooo-time-judged-all)

**Eiji**

WHAT THE HECK?!

**Ryotaro**

Wow

You and your boyfriend were really obvious

**Takumi**

I still can’t believe it took you that long to confess to that bird

**Tsukasa**

You guys should see the music video

He was super obvious even then

**Eiji**

...I’m gonna go scream now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ankh found his boyfriend later still screaming.


	66. Shinnosuke Threatens Haruto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Father’s Day with dad friend Tomari Shinnosuke!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018. Enjoy!

**Shinnosuke**

Everyone 

Thank you for the Father’s Day gifts

**Takeru**

Not a problem, senpai!

I hope you like the bucket of milk candies I sent you

**Sougo**

And the nice ties!

**Shinnosuke**

You guys are the greatest

Wait

GAH!

**Haruto**

I’m assuming you opened my package?

**Shinnosuke**

A glitter booby trap?! 

Really, Souma?!

What did I ever do to you?

**Haruto**

You made your stupid cars mess with me!

I couldn’t stand hearing a car honking for weeks!

And you dragged Rinko into messing with me!

**Shinnosuke**

You needed a lesson after that magic trick you used on my team during the whole Dr. Pacman thing!

**Haruto**

I needed to gain his trust!

**Aruto**

...Dr. Pacman thing? 

**Takeru**

It’s a long story

**Shinnosuke**

...Have I ever mentioned that Rinko told me about some things you wouldn’t want to come to light?

**Haruto**

...What has she mentioned?

**Shinnosuke**

She mentioned something about an animal transforming ring…

**Haruto**

YOU WOULDN’T DARE

**Shinnosuke**

I WOULD!

**Tsukasa**

Man, this is better than cable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, Rinko agreed to collab with Shinnosuke because she also thinks Haruto needs to be put in his place every once in a while.


	67. Philip Embarrasses Everyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Riders Group Chat was moved to a separate app after Philip accidentally sexted it. 
> 
> This was that message.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Valyrian3647. Also, I feel like I should dunk my head into a bucket of holy water now. Enjoy!

**_Timeline: Shortly after Sento was added_ **

**Philip**

You better hurry on home Shoutaro

I’m wearing that new lingerie you wanted and I can’t wait for you to pound me until I can’t move for a week 

The whips and chains I ordered have also arrived  
  
  


**Yusuke**

OMG THIS IS A PUBLIC CHAT YOU GUYS

**Shinji**

MY EYES 

IT BURNS

**Kenzaki**

THE MENTAL IMAGES

WHERE IS THE BRAIN BLEACH WHEN YOU NEED IT

**Ryotaro**

qrqprjwieznvmc

**Tsukasa**

Damn you two are kinky ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Eiji**

Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I stay in a room besides them!

**Gentaro**

Sex kita? 

**Shinnosuke**

That’s public indecency, Hidari (︶︹︶)

**Sento**

Oh, nice going you two (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و

**Philip**

I AM SO SORRY EVERYONE

I’m gonna go crawl into a hole now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Shoutaro was busy hurrying home to “punish” his Aibou.


	68. Haruto Has A Duel To The Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, the Taros cause more mayhem as usual. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by KomaedaYuujin. Enjoy!

**Sougo**

Ryotaro-senpai, could you go pick up your Imagin friends?

**Ryotaro**

Oh no

What did they do now?

**Emu**

Urataros possessed me and was flirting with Nico 

She’s looking at me funny now

**Shoutaro**

Ryutaros possessed me and tried to pet all the lost cats I had with me

I have like fifteen cat scratches now

**Takeru**

Kintaros possessed me and made me sleep through my chores

Akari is mad at me now

**Ryotaro**

...And Momotaros?

**Sougo**

He possessed Haruto-san and made him eat a pudding donut

Then this happened

**Sougo**

(photo of Wizard in Infinity Form fighting Den-O Sword Form with the other Imagins cheering in the background)

**Ryotaro**

Why aren’t the others stopping this?!

**Sougo**

They wanted to see Momotaros lose, if I recall correctly

**Ryotaro**

Ugh!

Why can’t I ever leave these guys unsupervised?! 

I’ll come as soon as I can!

**Kenzaki**

Wow, I never thought Haruto was so protective over eating only plain sugar donuts

**Kouta**

It’s his thing and I will never understand it to this day

**Sougo**

I feel bad for Nogami-san having to deal with this all the time, though

**Shoutaro**

Feels like he also has troublesome coworkers like I do at the agency

**Sento**

OI!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Haruto was arrested by Shinnosuke for destruction of public property and Ryotaro placed his Imagins in a time out corner.


	69. Tsukasa Plays Uno

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Game night with the Riders takes an interesting turn. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by tapmeawakeinsomnia. Enjoy!

**Sento**

How’s Game Night, Sougo-kun?

**Sougo**

Things took an… interesting turn 

**Sento**

What kind of interesting turn?

**Sougo**

(Photo of Tsukasa, Kenzaki, and Shinji using their transformation cards to play a game)

**Shoutaro**

...What the heck are they doing?   
  


**Sougo**

They told me it was Uno

**Kouta**

Wow

**Haruto**

Man, they use their stuff for this?

How pathetic

**Shoutaro**

This is coming from a guy who uses his magic just so he can grab a donut without getting up from his seat

**Haruto**

Aren’t you being a hypocrite, Mister “I use my powers to help me grab lost pets”?

**Shoutaro**

I do not do that!

**Sento**

You do use Luna to get cats down from trees, though

**Shoutaro**

Shut up, Sento!

**Emu**

How come I’m never invited to Game Night anymore, though?

**Shinnosuke**

...Remember what happened when we played Monopoly? 

**Emu**

Oh yeah

**Sougo**

Guys

There’s a problem

**Sougo**

(Photo of Daiki trying to choke Tsukasa)

**Haruto**

...What did he do this time?

**Sougo**

Apparently he used some of Kaito-san’s cards to play?

**Shinnosuke**

Figures

**Sougo**

Wait

Tsukuyomi just settled things

**Sougo**

(Photo of Tsukuyomi doing a suplex on Tsukasa)

**Shoutaro**

...Sweet mother of Gaim

**Kouta**

You’re one very lucky man, Sougo

**Sougo**

I know <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kouta later used the photo to make a meme that went viral instantly.


	70. Yua Goes On A Warpath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or someone incites the wrath of Kamen Rider Valkyrie. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by KuugaGouram2000. Also kind of short. Enjoy!

**Rinko**

Yua-san

Why is there a video of you kicking Nitoh in the crotch online?

**Yua**

To be fair, I was aiming for Souma but he dodged at the last second

**Sumiko**

Why did you need to kick him in the crotch anyway?

**Yua**

He used a spell on me and now my hair is purple 

**Rinko**

I thought I told him not to test his rings on anyone!

**Yua**

He told me you specifically said “not on any of his fellow Riders”

You didn’t say anything about us!

**Rinko**

Ugh

I hate loopholes sometimes

**Yua**

Anyway can you help me find the stupid wizard?

I still want to kill him 

**Rinko**

Easily arranged

**Yuuki**

I feel kind of bad for Haruto, though

**Kiriko**

He had it coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haruto was later sent to a hospital, while Emu shook his head in disappointment.


	71. Shoutaro Gets Cranky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Riders stay up late. Others do not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018. Also kind of short. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

GUYS

CAN YOU STOP TEXTING AT 2 IN THE MORNING?!

**Sento**

...I am not a morning person

**Takumi**

I prefer to stay up late as well

**Gentaro**

I have classes to teach tomorrow!

**Shinnosuke**

And cases to solve!

**Emu**

And patients to treat!

**Takumi**

Fine

I’ll get some sleep

**Shoutaro**

Thank you

Now… 

GO TO SLEEP, KIRYUU SENTO!

**Sento**

MAKE ME!

**Shoutaro**

...Can I call in a favor, Souma?

**Haruto**

Tell me a place I can get good plain sugar donuts and you have a deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haruto then proceeded to use the Sleep Ring on Sento and drew on his face for good measure.


	72. Ryu Passes Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or Shoutaro gets to one up Terui for once. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original entry on the Secondary Riders Chat. Also, now that Zero One is airing again, posts will be less frequent (mostly because I’m running short on ideas and motivation after one month). Enjoy!

**Hiiro**

Wait

Your wife is pregnant, Sakuta?

**Ryusei**

Yep

**Fukami**

Congratulations!

**Ryusei**

Thank you, Fukami

Although I am kind of nervous

Does anyone have advice for me

**Gou**

Be there as much as you can for her

**Yuuto**

Be prepared for less sleep

**Ryu**

And don’t panic

**Ryuuga**

You’re telling him to not panic?

I’m pretty sure you fainted when Akiko’s water broke

**Ryu**

I did not!

What’s your source?

**Ryuuga**

Shoutaro told me once

He even sent me a picture of when you were unconscious 

**Ryuuga**

(Photo of Ryu passed out in an ambulance)

**Keisuke**

...Wow

**Hikawa**

Nice going, Terui

**Goto**

Are you sure you’re more hardboiled than Hidari? 

**Ryu**

DO NOT ASK ME QUESTIONS!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Ryu finished work later, he spent the rest of his day chasing Shoutaro with the Engine Blade.


	73. Aruto Questions His Senpai's Dignity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What are some Riders like when they’re drunk? Let’s find out!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by KuugaGouram2000. This also takes place on the “SHIT IS GOING DOWN AGAIN” chat since it gives me more characters to interact. Enjoy!

**Aruto**

...Which of you guys gave my boyfriend alcohol?

**Goto**

It was Date-san’s idea

Was there a problem?

**Aruto**

Isamu was clinging to me the whole time I was taking him home 

And he weighed a lot so I had trouble carrying him into bed 

**Ankh**

Tell me about it

Somehow, being drunk made Eiji forget he revived me and he didn’t let go of me until I got him into bed

**Sougo**

At least your boyfriend didn’t try to punch Woz in the face

**Philip**

Or your other half was declaring how much that he and Terui were bros

**Ryuuga**

Or your husband was trying to strip in public!

**Aruto**

...Wow

I’m glad I went home early with Isamu now 

**Mitsuzane**

Speaking of boyfriends...

Has anyone seen Kouta-san?

I can’t find him

**Izu**

Aruto-sanchou

I had found a couple of troublemakers in front of the office and had them arrested

They look very familiar, though

Do you recognize them?

**Izu**

(photo of Kouta and Shouichi dancing in front of Hiden Intelligence in just their underwear)

**Emu**

...Is Kouta really wearing orange printed underwear?

**Philip**

Yep

And Tsugami seems to be wearing tomato printed underwear as well

**Hikawa**

THAT FUCKING IDIOT!

**Tsukasa**

Huh, so space gods CAN get drunk

**Aruto**

...Why are all my predecessors like this, Sougo-kun?

**Sougo**

No idea

**Hikawa**

I’m not paying for my boyfriend’s bail this time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Shinnosuke gave the two a Glare of Disappointment as he bailed them out for public indecency


	74. Isamu Chokes Someone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or the misadventures of Aruto and Shouichi continue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *looks at the recent events of Zero One* ...A little distraction from the stress of this show, everyone? This also takes place on the Secondary Rider chat. Enjoy!

**Hikawa**

...Help me

**Geiz**

What’s wrong, Hikawa-san? 

**Hikawa**

Hiden and Fuwa decided to visit Shouichi’s restaurant today

And now I am stuck in a sea of puns

**Daiki**

That bad?

**Hikawa**

I feel like shooting myself in the head

**Ren**

Why are you even dating that idiot anyway?

**Hikawa**

To be honest, I have no idea

At least watching Fuwa is making up for it

**Hikawa**

(photo of Isamu trying miserably to hold back his laughter) 

**Gou**

...Sweet mother of Gaim, he looks like a dying animal!

**Date**

Or someone who was just kicked in the crotch

**Yuuto**

Or a hyena 

**Hikawa**

I know right? 

If you ask me, Isamu has terrible taste in his love life

I mean, just look at Hiden!

He’s a qrpewuiqiurope;lknx

**Fukami**

Hikawa-san?

**Hikawa**

This is Tsugami, everyone

Can somebody explain why Fuwa just attacked my boyfriend?

**Gou**

...Must’ve saw what Hikawa said about Hiden

**Geiz**

How bad is it?

**Hikawa**

Very bad

**Hikawa**

(photo of Isamu putting Hikawa in a chokehold) 

**Ryu**

What the heck?!

**Kagami**

Remind me to never make this wolf mad

**Yuuto**

Well, Hikawa did kind of ask for it

**Gou**

Bet you 3000 yen that Fuwa will win! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aruto had to call in Yua to help break up the fight.


	75. Ryuuga Has A Panic Attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aka another typical day in the Narumi Detective Agency.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018. Takes place on the Narumi Detective Agency chat. Enjoy!

**Sento**

Philip, why is my husband currently passed out on the ground?

**Philip**

...I may have told him he might be pregnant?

**Shoutaro**

...Philip, that’s not physically possible

**Philip**

Yeah, but he accidentally drank my last soda in the fridge

So I told him it was actually one of my experiments to see if I could get a male specimen pregnant 

**Shoutaro**

...And he fell for it? 

**Philip**

To be fair, he did also ate that chicken I made you yesterday that you said was not quite...edible 

**Shoutaro**

Ah

**Sento**

Are you telling me you kind of gave my husband a panic attack? 

**Philip**

It appears so? 

**Shoutaro**

…Why do I love you again? 

**Sento**

Can you please not trick Ryuuga like that? 

I told Ryuuga that when we have kids, we would be completely prepared for it

And we are most certainly not right now!

**Philip**

Fine….

**Shoutaro**

Well, at least that’s handled with

Although, I did half expect that you would be the one pregnant, Sento

**Sento**

What’s that supposed to mean? 

**Shoutaro**

...You’re pretty much the girl in your relationship with Ryuuga

**Sento**

I AM NOT!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When things were cleared up with Ryuuga, he also agreed that Sento is the mom in the relationship.


	76. Sento Tries To Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In retrospect, asking Sento for help was probably not one of Aruto’s best ideas. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to the finale of Zero One. Good run, you guys! Also contains spoilers. Enjoy!

**Aruto**

Sento-san

Can I ask a favor?

**Tsukasa**

...Are you sure that’s a good idea, kid?

**Sento**

I do not cause that much explosions, Kadoya!

**Shoutaro**

I beg to differ, Sento!

**Sento**

Moving on!

What do you want, Aruto?

**Aruto**

It’s about Izu

Gai-san and Yaiba said there might be a way to get Izu’s old memories back

But we need an expert for that

Can you help?

**Sento**

Sure I can!

I can’t wait to study these Humagears and their processes

And before you say anything, Shoutaro

I promise I will not cause any explosions!

**Shoutaro**

I sincerely doubt that

**Haruto**

1000 yen that he somehow pulls that off

**Shoutaro**

...You’re on

* * *

**Aruto**

Shoutaro-san, Philip-san

This is Yaiba

We were able to successfully restore Izu’s memories

But Sento accidentally electrocuted Aruto in the process

He’s currently being treated for his wounds

Will you come over to HIDEN Intelligence to pick up Kiryuu-san?

**Shoutaro**

...

**Sougo**

...At least Sento-san didn’t cause an explosion?

**Philip**

We’ll come as soon as we can

Where’s Sento, though?

**Aruto**

Kiryuu-san is also being treated for injuries right now after what Fuwa did

**Aruto**

(photo of Isamu tackling Sento as Izu is busy trying to resuscitate an unconscious Aruto)

**Tsukasa**

Saw that coming

**Shoutaro**

...I need a drink

**Haruto**

You still owe me money, Hidari!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sento was later returned to the Narumi Detective Agency with a black eye.


	77. Sento Thirsts Over His Husband

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More fun with Toku actors and what they do!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by Dailan. Takes place on the Narumi Detective Agency chat. Enjoy!

**Sento**

Oi, musclehead

I need to talk to you about something 

**Ryuuga**

Bout what?

**Sento**

Look what I found in my research

**Sento**

**Sento**

Why can’t you wear more stuff like this?!

**Ryuuga**

...Aren’t you satisfied with what we already bought?!

**Sento**

Are you saying I can't want more from you?!

**Ryuuga**

No, I...

Ugh!

Fine! I'll do it!

**Sento**

Thank you! <3

**Shoutaro**

WTF YOU GUYS

WHY ARE YOU GUYS DOING THIS ON THE AGENCY CHAT?!

**Sento**

Oh, wrong chat

Sorry bout that, Shoutaro 

But Philip gave me the idea to research some stuff about our actors and I had to tell my husband about it

**Shoutaro**

OMG

STOP GIVING THEM IDEAS, PHILIP!

**Philip**

Shoutaro 

We’re research buddies 

It’s what we do!

**Sento**

Speaking of research

Look what I found while I was looking up my husband, Philip

**Sento**

**Shoutaro**

GAH!

**Ryuuga**

Nice skirt, Shoutaro 

**Philip**

Me likey <3

Can you wear it for me please?

**Shoutaro**

DAMNIT, KIRYU!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Akiko was reading the whole thing laughing her head off.


	78. Parad Gets In Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or bad gamer habits don’t apply well in a hospital. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original chat on the “SHIT IS GOING DOWN AGAIN” chat. Also, I apologize to any Emu fans for the following sequence. Enjoy!

**Emu**

Parad!

We need to talk!

**Parad**

Bout what?

**Shoutaro**

...My chief’s daughter somehow knows what the word “fuck” is

**Sento**

No wonder Akiko looks ready to kill someone!

**Emu**

Apparently when Haruna was getting a check up she heard you cursing

Explain!

**Parad**

Those freaking RNG are taunting me, Emu!

I nearly spent all my diamonds on the new gacha and I still didn’t get any rares!

I am this close to throwing my phone out a window

**Emu**

I thought I told you to hold back on your swear words!

**Parad**

Don’t you do that all the time when we’re playing co-op?!

**Emu**

That’s because those were in private quarters!

**Poppy**

...Wow, I haven’t seen Emu this angry since the time the power went out during our last Smash Bros tournament at the CR

**Sento**

Well, you know what they say, beware the nice ones

**Haruto**

And Emu is pretty much the mom among us

**Parad**

...Wait, what?

**Emu**

I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NEVER TO CALL ME THAT!

**Poppy**

I think it fits

**Emu**

Really, Poppy?!

This is supposed to be about Parad!

**Poppy**

Come on Emu, it’s cute!

And some of the others agree

**Poppy**

(photo of Nico and Kiriya on the floor laughing their heads off)

**Emu**

AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!

**Parad**

...What the heck did I just witness?

**Shoutaro**

Hojo just losing all of his cool points

**Haruto**

I didn’t think he had any

**Emu**

DAMNIT SOUMA!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emu went Hyper Muteki on Haruto as Kiriya and Nico continued laughing for two more hours. It was also reported that Hiiro and Taiga seemed to be snickering at their workplaces. 


	79. Touma Joins The Mayhem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a certain writer joins the chat and a massive prank contest occurs (minus Mom and Dad because they’re responsible, and Gentaro cause he’s too pure to prank anyone). 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween everyone! Let’s celebrate it by welcoming Saber! Enjoy!

**Touma**

Um, Hiden-senpai?

Is this working?

**Aruto**

Yes, it is!

**Sougo**

Aruto, who is this?

**Aruto**

Sougo-kun, Takeru-kun, this is my successor, Touma Kamiyama, aka Kamen Rider Saber!

**Takeru**

Pleasure to meet you, Touma-kun! (＾▽＾)

I’m Takeru Tenkuuji, aka Kamen Rider Ghost!

**Sougo**

And I am Sougo Tokiawa, Kamen Rider Zi-O!

**Touma**

It’s an honor to meet you all!

**Aruto**

Welcome to the squad! 

I was thinking you could join us in the plan

**Touma**

Of what?

**Takeru**

We’re gonna pull an epic Halloween prank on the other Riders

You in?

**Touma**

That does sound a little fun…

Won’t the other retaliate, though? 

**Aruto**

We’re having a prank competition for Halloween 

We’re in teams and you seem a perfect pick for this one!

**Touma**

A Rider group event?

I’m in!

**Sougo**

Great!

So, do we have the lasers and fog machine ready, Aruto?

* * *

**Emu**

...I told you this contest would be a bad idea

**Tsukasa**

I REGRET NOTHING!

**Shinnosuke**

Tell that to the BOMB SQUAD we had to bring in!

What the hell was with that, Kiryu?!

**Sento**

Oi, don’t look at me!

Kazuraba, Philip, Tendou, and Kido somehow made explosive goo bombs!

Was it really necessary, you guys?! 

**Philip**

I thought you looked fine

Truly a genius

**Sento**

Why I outta!

**Shoutaro**

Which one of you lots were responsible for the wild animal infestation in my office?!

One of the pigeons nearly ruined my windscale!

**Eiji**

That would be me, Takumi, Shouichi, and Wataru 

I thought it would be nice after your paint balloon barrage with Yusuke, Kenzaki, and Tsukasa

You ruined my good pantsu!

**Shouchi**

Which group was responsible for causing freak weather accidents in my restaurant?

I’ve been getting complaints

  
**Haruto**

That would be me, Hitoshi, Sento, and Ryotaro

We wanted to be creative

By the way, I apologize for nearly setting you on fire, Touma

**Touma**

It was okay 

I had fun going as fake ghosts with Takeru-senpai, Sougo-senpai, and Aruto-senpai!

Although, I did nearly mistake you for a woman with your scream

And Shoutaro-san’s reminded me of one as well

**Emu**

Sweet mother of Gaim, the new guy has just joined and you’re already corrupting him!

**Tsukasa**

No offense, but when has any of us NOT been corrupted?

**Shinnosuke**

...I hate it when you’re right sometimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, Gentaro was watching the madness secretly glad he wasn’t prank on from what he saw. 


	80. Touma Gets Scratched

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or Touma hangs out with Takeru when there’s a slight mix up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idea inspired by LuminoEverdark. Also, cestlavieminako made me come up with the headcanon that Touma writes RPF. Enjoy!

**Takeru**

Touma-kun

I think I took your bag by mistake

**Touma**

You have it?

Thank god, I thought something bad happened to my stuff

Is my notebook still there?

**Takeru**

Yes

**Touma**

Good!

Whatever you do, don’t look into it!

**Takeru**

Why?

**Tsukasa**

You write porn, don’t you?

**Shinnosuke**

Get your mind out of the gutter, Kadoya!

**Touma**

No!

...I write fanfic of you guys

**Kouta**

WHAT?!

**Sento**

How is that any better?!

**Sougo**

Well he said he didn’t write porn, right?

At least he doesn’t write porn about us...

**Shoutaro**

That’s slightly better

**Touma**

Anyway, can I get my stuff back soon?

I have a commission from one “Daiki K.” I have to finish soon...

**Tsukasa**

...Dammit, Kaito

**Touma**

Am I missing something?

**Sento**

****It’s a complicated story

**Takeru**

That reminds me

Is Yurusen okay?

She was in my bag when the mix up happened

**Touma**

Yes, she’s okay

But she already attacked me and my friends

Just look 

**Touma**

(photo of Yurusen on top of Ren’s face, scratching him)

**Takeru**

OMG

I am so sorry about her!

I’ll come as soon as I can! 

**Sougo**

Why is your cat so mean to everyone, Takeru-senpai?

**Sento**

I think they’re all like that, kid

I still remember this one incident between Shoutaro and Mick...

**Shoutaro**

YOU PROMISED NOT TO TALK ABOUT IT, KIRYU!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Yurusen was picked, she was subjected to a punishment of no treats of the week. And Shoutaro tackled Sento for mentioning the Mick Incident.


	81. Rintaro Is Mortified

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or Rintaro accidentally reads Touma’s notebook. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *stares at Saber episodes* ...Well, this got dark quickly so let’s take our minds off it with more chats! Request by narashikari. Also a follow up to chapter 80 taking place on the secondary group chat, with some sexuality headcanons. Enjoy!

**Rintaro**

...I have witnessed true evil

**Daiki**

Oi, new guy

What’s wrong?

**Rintaro**

I just looked at Touma’s notebook

And I just discovered he writes fanfics of us

As couples

And he does these commissions from fangirls

**Isamu**

WHAT?!

**Gou**

That’s… a bit horrifying 

**Rintaro**

I don’t understand

Just… Why us?

What makes us so…. shippable? 

**Ryuuga**

Listen Rintaro

A good portion of us are not straight 

**Rintaro**

...Really?

**Kaoru**

I’m demisexual

**Hikawa**

Gay

**Ren**

I’m bisexual

**Kagami**

I’m gay

**Daiki**

Also very gay!

**Akira**

I’m gay as well

**Shintaro**

Graysexual, I think?

**Nitoh**

Asexual over here

**Gou**

Bisexual for me!

**Fukami**

Asexual as well

**Ryuuga**

I’m bisexual 

**Geiz**

So am I

**Isamu**

Graysexual for my boyfriend, thank you very much

**Rintaro**

....I can’t believe this

Just… what the heck have I gotten myself into?

**Ryu**

Trust me, Rintaro

Life is anything but normal for Riders around here

**Akira**

By the way, kid

Do you know how much these commissions are?

I have a few ideas…. 

**Goto**

DATE-SAN NO!

**Akira**

DATE-SAN YES!

**Iori**

...By Gaim, I hate being one of the only sane people around here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Touma was happy to find a new customer waiting for him. And Goto was found blushing up a storm. 


	82. Tsukasa Gets A Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The most epic snowball fight in the history of forever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays, everyone! Here’s a little Christmas treat for you all! This takes place on the “SHIT IS GOING DOWN AGAIN” chat. Enjoy!

**Natsumi**

Hey, has anybody seen the boys?

The holiday buffet’s ready

**Mei**

I’m pretty sure most of them are outside

I’ll check

Wait

OMG

**Izu**

What is it, Mei?

**Mei**

They’re having a snowball fight

And it’s nothing like I’ve ever seen

Should we… let them?

**Natusmi**

Let them

Hopefully things won’t get too out of control...

* * *

**Sougo**

Man, that was fun!

**Tsukasa**

What’s fun about making me fall into a freaking river?!

**Sougo**

Punishment for attacking Woz

He’s my friend, no matter how annoying he is

**Woz**

Thank you for that, Waga Maou! (* ^ ω ^)

**Hiiro**

Intern

Why did you turn on me and joined Shinnosuke’s group attacking us?

**Emu**

I thought you needed to be took down a peg for disrespecting me

I earned my right to do it!

**Hiiro**

Why I outta!

**Shinnosuke**

What I want to know is when were powers allowed in the fight!

What the hell was with that giant snowball, Souma?!

**Haruto**

Kouta started it first, when he made me tripped with his stupid vines!

**Kouta**

It’s called survival of the fittest, Haruto

Look it up!

And at least I didn’t bring a freaking snow bazooka!

**Sento**

One of my finer works, if I do say so myself 

**Hina**

Seems like you boys had a good time

You better invite us next time you have another snowball fight

**Eiji**

I hate to see your super strength in action, Hina

**Kento**

That reminds me

Which one of you tried to kill my childhood friend with a giant ice ball?!

**Isamu**

THAT GUY GAVE MY BOYFRIEND A BLACK EYE WITH HIS SNOWBALLS!

**Shoutaro**

...Oh great, we got another Ryuuga

**Ryuuga**

OI!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, Aruto is currently receiving medical attention while apologizing to Touma about his boyfriend.


	83. Daiki Throws Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aka hangovers, Rider style! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year everyone! Have this request by AnkhsAngel! Enjoy!

**Eiji**

Oi, everyone 

Me and Shinji-san found the secondaries

**Shinnosuke**

You found them? 

Thank Gaim, I was worried when I couldn’t find them at the new year party

Where are they?

**Shinji**

They’re at Cafe Coussier

Apparently, Date thought a good way to induct Touma’s secondary into the group was to go out drinking together 

Now they’re all hungover and it ain’t pretty

Just look at this picture I got

**Shinji**

(photo of Gou puking into a small trash can)

**Sougo**

Ew

**Shoutaro**

Wait

All of them got drunk? 

**Eiji**

Not all of them

Ryuuga is the only one still coherent 

For some reason he didn’t get drunk at all despite the amount of alcohol that he consumed 

**Sento**

Must be his Blood Tribe genes

Remind me to take a blood sample of him later

**Sougo**

Is everyone okay, though?

**Shinji**

Not everyone

Ren was in an armwrestling match with Geiz and I’m pretty sure my boyfriend broke your boyfriend’s arm

**Sougo**

Oh, Tsuki’s not gonna be happy about this (＃＞＜)

**Eiji**

Terui-san also tried to bench press Date on top of a table but the table broke

By the way, Chiyoko told me they he needs to pay for the broken table so she already forwarded the bill to the agency, Shoutaro

**Shoutaro**

...Of course she did

**Touma**

What about Rintaro?

Is he okay?

**Shinji**

Oh, Ryuuga told me he passed out after at least one drink along with Hiiro and Fukami

Talk about lightweights

**Touma**

At least they didn’t cause any trouble

**Eiji**

Anyway, can you guys please hurry and pick up the others?

Kadoya’s boyfriend already puked on Ankh and he’s about to murder him for that

**Tsukasa**

HE’S NOT MY BOYFRIEND!

**Kouta**

Keep telling yourself that, pinky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the time Tsukasa came, Ankh had already knocked Daiki out cold.


	84. Sento Gets Possessive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aka Sento discovers a drama known as Cherry Magic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by GNR2018 and KomaedaYuujin. A little short, but quite effective. Enjoy!

**Shoutaro**

Ugh

I hate my life sometimes

**Shinnosuke**

What’s the matter, Hidari?

**Shoutaro**

Kadoya introduced Kiryuu to this BL drama that has his husband’s actor in it

And now he’s being extra gross with Ryuuga

**Wataru**

That bad?

**Shoutaro**

It’s disgusting

I can’t go five minutes without that bunny boy doing something R rated to his husband

**Emu**

Sweet mother of…

**Shinji**

Ugh, doesn’t he have any sense of shame?!

**Sento**

Don’t look at me like that

What’s wrong with me having fun with my husband?

Besides, people should know that this wonderful butt belongs to me and me alone!

**Kouta**

Ugh, TMI!

**Shoutaro**

What is wrong with you Kadoya?!

Why do you continue to encourage him?! 

**Tsukasa**

Because it’s fun?

By the way Philip

Your husband’s new drama has a scene where he’s completely nude

**Philip**

...Really? 

**Tsukasa**

I can send you a picture as proof (^_-)—☆

**Philip**

Send it as soon as possible 

**Shoutaro**

WTF

**Touma**

...This is normal around here?

**Aruto**

For some unfortunate reason, yes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutaro was later found banging his head on his desk.


	85. Kouta Gets Teased

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are two things true about Kouta Kazuraba: he’s short and an idiot. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another crackish yet funny idea, courtesy of tumblr users pointing this out. Also, I apologize to Kouta for posting this on his birthday. Enjoy!

**Shinnosuke**

Sougo, we got your message

What’s wrong?

**Sougo**

Look what Haruto-san just posted

**Sougo**

(photo of Haruto using Kouta’s head as an armrest) 

**Emu**

...Wow, I hadn’t realized Kouta-san was so short

**Shoutaro**

And this is important because?

**Takeru**

Apparently there’s a fight now happening outside Touma’s bookstore

See?

**Takeru**

(photo of Wizard dueling Gaim)

**Touma**

Could you guys please hurry and stop them? 

They’re scaring Mei and the others aren’t really doing anything to stop them

**Shinnosuke**

What others?

**Sougo**

A bunch of Riders came to watch the show

Tsukasa-senpai is already taking bets

**Takeru**

Sento-san’s taping the whole thing as well

**Touma**

Ren also came and is handing out popcorn

**Aruto**

Even Philip is cheering for Haruto-san

**Emu**

Are we really surrounded by idiots around here?!

We’re on it!

* * *

**Shinnosuke**

Do you two have anything to say for yourselves?

**Kouta**

HE STARTED IT!

**Haruto**

Not my fault you’re tiny!

**Tsukasa**

You guys are a bunch of party poopers, you know that?

**Shoutaro**

We are trying to keep the peace here among us!

**Kenzaki**

I like the part where they started name calling 

**Philip**

And when Kouta told Haruto he was a twink

**Tsukasa**

I still want my bet money back, Tendou!

**Souji**

Grandma once said: “Nobody likes a sore loser!” 

**Emu**

...You guys are the worst sometimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kouta was later found pouting in a corner about the photo. And Sento's video of the fight went viral.


	86. Aruto Gets A Nosebleed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or, Ryuuga and Isamu become gym buddies. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I blame Kari-chan for this, because of all her Renn fangirling on workout pics. Also, have your boyfriend thirsting over you for your birthday, Isamu! Enjoy!

**Aruto**

Sento-san

Why did you let Isamu be gym buddies with your husband?

He’s been sending me workout pictures all day and I can’t concentrate on work!

**Sento**

Aw, come on Aruto

It’s mostly harmless, don’t you think?

**Aruto**

I had a nosebleed and almost ruined my documents for today!

**Sento**

Oh

But come on

I wouldn’t blame you, kid

Our boys are works of art

**Shoutaro**

Guys

Could you not do this on this group chat?

I do not need you guys fawning over your boyfriends!

I already have enough of you fawning over your husband in the office, Kiryuu!

**Sento**

Aren’t you one to talk, Hidari?

I mean, aren’t you doing the same thing to Philip with Ryuuga?

**Sento**

(photo of Shoutaro and Ryuuga weight lifting, both shirtless)

**Philip**

aqwrepznjvifadjopsouqprew

**Shoutaro**

Sweet mother of… 

You made my husband pass out, Sento!

I hope you’re happy!

**Sento**

So worth it

Hope you ready for a long night, Hidari

**Shoutaro**

DAMN IT!

**Haruto**

...Am I glad that I’m asexual

**Emu**

Seriously, Sento

Do you have any shame?!

**Shinnosuke**

You’re disgusting, Kiryuu!

There are minors on this chat, you know!

**Takeru**

...I’m in my twenties, Tomari-san

**Sougo**

And I’m old enough to drink now!

**Tsukasa**

Face it, kids

You’re stuck with that for this group

**Sougo**

(*￣m￣)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needless to say, Shoutaro, Ryuuga, and Isamu didn’t get much sleep that night.


	87. Misora Gets Some Girl Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for some chocolate making with Rider girls!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! Have some Rider gals for the day! Enjoy!

**Mana**

Okay, gals

Have any of the other guys requested to join Shouichi’s chocolate making class?

**Yua**

Isamu signed up to surprise Aruto kun

Just be careful in case he breaks anything

**Kiriko**

Chase also wants to make some for Gou

But be wary of any… awkward comments he makes

We’re still trying to work on his social skills

**Akiko**

Phillip as well

Just don’t let him near anything that’s flammable 

**Misora**

He’s that bad?

**Akiko**

I lost count of how many stoves he destroyed

**Mana**

Okay then

Let’s get to work, girls

* * *

**Yuki**

That was super fun, everyone! <3

The boys are gonna love these!

**Yuki**

(photo of chocolate that look like chibi versions of the KRC)

**Akari**

So cute, Yuki-chan!

**Akiko**

I have to say, that wasn’t a complete disaster

Philip even only caused one fire!

**Yua**

I’m surprised you handed that quickly, Kazaya san 

**Mana**

Wouldn’t be the first time an explosion happened

Hikawa-san has tried to cook for Shouichi as a surprise several times

They never ended well 

**Tsukuyomi**

I had a fun time with Sougo-kun!

Geiz is gonna love our chocolates

**Misora**

I’m just glad I finally got some girl time for once

It’s nice to get away from all our boy problems, right?

**Hina**

I couldn’t agree more, Misora

**Akari**

Wait, everyone

Have you heard about this, Akiko-san?

**Akari**

(photo of the detective agency with giant vines surrounding them)

**Akiko**

...I didn’t hear anything about this!

**Kiriko**

What happened over there?!

**Sawa**

Wait, got a message from Banjou

Apparently Sento was trying to grow some flowers for valentines

And this was the result

**Akiko**

...I can’t even

Misora, want to help me with some plant control?

**Misora**

Gladly

I’ll make sure my knife’s extra sharp!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile at the office, Ryuuga was trying to get Ryu down from the vines while Shoutaro was lecturing Sento.

**Author's Note:**

> please check asknarashikari on tumblr for more!
> 
> And ideas are always welcome!


End file.
